Give it up for the retarded American!

Years back, I bumped into a former high school classmate. I hate it when this happens because most times, they usually look amazing and it is then that life decides to fool around with me because annoyingly, I find myself looking like I have just been rejected by hell itself! Anyway, this girl, I remember, was one of those quite, almost invisible chicks in school; she attributes the little fame she had to her pretty face. While the rest of us wrote silly nothings to boys, she was busy making peace with God or singing hymns! After high school she took her disciplined self to Namibia for further studies. But apparently, she attained more than a degree while she was there. The girl came back with what I can assure you was a retarded American accent. How do you go to Namibia and come back with an American accent really?I do not hate on accents, but I find it annoying that some people are too keen on impressing that they will use a shopped accent to stand out. Do they realise how annoying it can be listening to them? The worst part is when they put the letter r where it doesn’t belong…like instead of basket, they say, barsket! I know…who does that?I understand at times people pick up genuine accents when they have been in a foreign country for long but for the love of God, you leave the country for two months and come back with some strange accent? People, let’s come to town!But then again these fake accents come as a blessing in disguise; they have made it easier to spot fake people. They are like the identity of people trying hard to be who they are not. The moment anyone switches to a fake accent is the moment I stop taking them seriously. Accents also come with a pretense that one has been abroad when the closest they have been to America is watching Oprah on television. People with fake accents are the likeliest to say fake things like “when I was in America I”.... or... “in America we don’t do this...”For ladies, accents come with an inflated value. It breaks my heart to see most of them speak condescendingly to guys thinking that accents have made them classy. For guys fake accents go hand in hand with thinking they can lay any chick they speak to. They imagine that accents impress ladies and will do most of the convincing for them. If they only knew!