I hate people who...

…think it is a legal requirement to try every item on the buffet. This cannot be described just as greed. These hungry fellows not only have empty stomachs but also empty heads. These fools will try to add everything they see at the buffet on their plate. By the time they are done the plate has all tribes of food plus the appetiser mushroom soup, dessert fruits, toothpicks and napkins. Everything is on the plate even the drinking straw. A buffet is for you to choose what you like out of the many choices not to crowd your plate with things that will confine you to the toilet seat. …say stupid things like “Can I tell you something interesting?” I am sure you have met such unfortunate people. How do you ask me whether you should tell me something interesting? Who says it’s even interesting just because you are about to say it? Who sent you to interest me anyway? Do I look like I could entertain the option of being bored that now you think it is better to ask me first? And what happens if what you have to say is not interesting? Do I get back the five minutes of my life that you just wasted? I wonder how such people escape from mental hospitals. …say ignorant things like, “To tell you the truth...” The cousins of the devils mentioned above are surely these ones who spread their mandibles to utter senseless stuff like, “To tell you the truth...” Does this mean that on all other occasions I was being told lies? What has changed now that you feel the need to tell me the truth? And once you are done, can I assume that everything said after will be a lie? Why do you feel the urge to say such ignorant crap? Would it not be much better if you continued to hold on to some level of silence? Surely the world does not some of these people’s views. …send a text and then go ahead to beep you. I must say here that impatient people make me sick. I actually wonder why they just don’t commit suicide if indeed they are in a hurry. After all we shall all die eventually; they can help us by just leaving before. You know the annoying jokers who text you and before you can read the text they are beeping you. They sometimes even call just to say, “Have you seen the message I just sent you?” Well if you could allow me to read it instead of calling me then maybe the world would be a better place. …over speed while driving on dusty roads in residential areas. I speak for all the people who do not reside in Nyarutarama, Kiyovu or any of the fortunate residential places where the roads are all paved. Yes it is that time of the year when rain becomes scarcer than money. The sun is vicious and the dust is everywhere. This should not be a licence for one to advertise their mental deficiencies by over speeding on a dusty road leaving the rest of us to swallow the cloud of dust you leave behind. You are lucky you got that bank loan and bought a RAV4 or one of those tax-free Land Cruisers. Your car may be a big one but you have a peanut brain if you think those outside the car enjoy the dust you leave behind. I pray you crush your Japanese metal coffin into a big tree. Let me help you hate by sending your suggestions to thehater2009@gmail.com or text me at +250 788 545293.