Learning from my mother’s death

I was enjoying the wonderful climate of Rwanda during May and early June as India reeled under the intense heat of summer. I used to call my parents to visit me here around this time but they always said, “No, come home.” Following the same routine, I called them this year and they demanded that I visit them. Before I could decide my travel date, unfortunately and unexpectedly my mother passed away on June 5. I never got the chance to meet her one last time.Overnight, her death has taught me many life lessons. I used to call her regularly but that was just to exchange small news. There were so many things I needed to tell her in detail, so many things to be discussed. The first lesson I got is to keep communication open and talk to your loved ones as much as you can because once they pass away, you will never get the chance.She was a very organised person and was always critical when I lost things or procrastinated. At that time I always resented her criticism, but now I have learnt a valuable lesson. Time does not wait for anybody. If you postpone something for another day, that day may never come.Though my mother and I were very close, unknowingly and sometimes knowingly, I hurt her by not obeying her, by not doing things the way she desired. Unfortunately, I regret that now and I don’t have the opportunity to apologise. Since growing up, I have realised that whatever she asked me to do was based on her wide experience of the world and she was always correct. One should respect and follow the wisdom of elders. She always used to tell me that you can always learn from your seniors. Observe those who are successful and try to analyse and adopt the skills which make them successful. Equally important is to observe the unsuccessful people and quit if you have any of the traits they have. Now I realise she was correct and I have learnt through her that your seniors always guide you directly or indirectly.Life does not remain the same after the death of a mother. She run the entire household without talking about it. The meals were served in time, clothes kept ready to wear, and the house sparkled. Now harsh reality has struck and it’s not as easy as it looked running an entire household. One should always respect the women who take care of the home. It is only through their efforts that others are free to pursue their studies and jobs. My mother is no longer there for me to tell her how much I owe her my life, my career, skills I learnt and the love for reading and writing. But I would like to tell you all that if your mother or any elders are alive, always tell them how much you respect and love them before it is too late.