Some favours are simply useless

This article is about people who attempt to make this world a better place with their unsolicited acts of human kindness ...and why they are a bother. The point is, even though we generally like it when people do nice things for us, there are some favours no one really wants.Holding doors open from 30 feet awayIt is a lovely gesture when someone holds a door open for you. It’s a wonderful way of saying, “Hey there …here you go! Please benefit from the fruit of my labor as you journey from one location to another.”But no one likes it when you hold a door open for someone who’s like 30 feet away. What’s that? All it does is create 15, 20, 30 seconds of an awkward silence.Offering to go with you, if you can just wait for like five minutesIt’s typically a good gesture to offer companionship to someone riding solo. “Hi… I can come with you!” What better present than giving the gift of you! No need to travel alone, good friend. We shall walk side by side along this road of life!But no one likes it when your offer of companionship comes with a delay. “Oh, you’re going to corner shop to do some shopping? I’ll go with you ... just give me like five minutes.” No, no, no, I will not give you five minutes. Why? Because I can actually stroll to the shop and be back safely, all by myself. And I want to do that NOW, not in five minutes. Besides, it’s never five minutes like you say.Lending you books, music or movies you don’t wantIt’s a lovely gesture to share things with friends. And sometimes friends share things that must be returned, like books (when books existed) and CDs (when CDs existed) and movies. Whatever the case, it’s usually flattering when someone wants you to experience the same joy they’ve felt from a piece of art. Flattering because it’s your friend’s way of telling you that you share their sensibilities.But no one ever likes it when you force your crap on them. And don’t give me that “Oh, but you asked!” garbage. If you’re hanging out in your cubicle jamming and leg-tapping to tunes and someone asks, “What are you listening to?”, that is not a cue for you to insist they take home your collection of Celine Dion and Lady Gaga. I was just being polite.What is even worse is that once you force us to borrow it, you follow it up with “Did you listen to it yet? Did you?” No. No, I didn’t. I’m going to instead stare at it for many weeks until it finally makes me so sick that I skim it for 30 seconds, pick one song I will claim to like, say the rest is OK and discreetly leave it on your chair the next time I visit.

Lifestyle

Some favours are simply useless