Get your own man already!

Guys listen, when the Bible tells you to love your neighbour as you love yourself- it is not pushing you to go around falling in love with other women’s husbands.A friend showed up at my house over the weekend with a borrowed man - fairly handsome, I must admit. He was well groomed- neatly cut nails, properly shaved beard, cologne and clean clothes.Do not get me wrong, I am not insinuating that bachelors cannot be that neat. I am simply saying this man came off as a metrosexual who had a woman’s touch added to him. So anyway, we got into the scientific talk of how skydiver, Felix Baumgartner, broke the sound barrier - got a few physics lessons too (not that science means jack @*%# to me anyway! But what do you know, the dude was brilliant, and for a minute there I believed I was having a conversation with Einstein himself – now there’s a “full package”!Speaking of science, let me give you a brief lesson that will come in handy one day- Amygdala is the most primitive part of the human brain that senses danger. Some of you like to say that it is your heart. Now the next time you hear it communicating please listen to it and you will avoid embarrassing moments that my friend and I had to encounter- because I deliberately ignore those little voices!Moving on, two hours into the drink up- a mad woman walks through my door, do not ask me how she knew my place- it beats me to this day.In her right hand was a big bamboo stick and the other was used to push aside anybody in her way. Having been the one seated closer to the man and looking bored stiff with endless physics lessons, I got a taste of that stick first.I was most certainly not drinking yet there I was seeing double- still trying to recover from the disorientation – I was struck yet again.Instantly I recollected myself and pointed right to where the culprit was.Before she could make her way to the girl- she decided the man was not going to walk off scot-free, he got the beating of a life time, but nothing compared to what the ‘man-stealing’ girl received.I kept her weave and a broken acrylic nail as a souvenir!