“Heat and Vision Empire”

As the English adage goes “all that ends up in a well, ends up well”; after the Wedding function, many of us were suffering from “thirst”, we had been forced to “eat” on empty stomachs and here we were, still moving on the same “empty” stomach, yet full of all sorts of semi-useless stuff, one needed to have something in the stomach. As has become the case, most weddings no longer server the real stuff, they will server so many tribes of sodas but leave out a few of the “most vital” sodas. This reminds me of a guy that wend visiting at one of Kigali’s many Pastors’ homes. On arrival, he met the Pastor’s wife; she too was a daughter of yet another Pastor. To cut the long story short, the lady of the house calls the house help who asks the visitor as to what kind of Fanta he would take. He tells the house help that, hewould take “FANTA SKOL”. The “Fanta SKOL” is subsequently brought in; ironically, such “Fantas”come in pairs! When the visitor had finished doing justice to the first bottle was attacking the second one, the Pastor, himself walks in and is greatly perturbed, he calls out, “Cherie, ninde ubahaye uruhusha kuzana inzoga muri uru rugo (who has allows booze into this home)?”, the lady was left wondering, she replied, “none si Cherie, nanjye ko ntanzoga nzi (how would I know that it was booze”! Since the kind of “Fanta” many of us were yearning for were not served, we had to find them where they are served not in pairs but whole crates! Having left Ruti township, we headed for a place called “HEAT”, my goodness, this place was indeed on fire, I suppose, they should rename it from HEAT to FIRE! At HEAT, the music was loud and superb, the drinks were even greater. No sooner had we settled down than the “rain” of beers began flowing. It was as if we had arrived at the “Beer Well” and as is the saying, “All that ends up in the well, ends well”. We were eager to transform our otherwise “empty” stomach to full ones if not fool! I cannot easily describe this place on such a limited page, I hope, I will give a full account of HEAT one day! The crowd was mammoth; the drinks were great, the music excellent, and wow! As the clocks were ticking towards midnight, we decided that, we had had enough of the HEAT, if we stayed much longer, we could catch fire. It was time to re-locate. The next venue was Vision Empire. Since time was our enemy number one, we had to scan all places as quickly as possible. We decided to leave for the Vision Empire. This is the best Disco Theque in the whole of Western Uganda. Don’t as me to compare it with Kigali as the Baganda say, “Monkey can never judge the forest”. At the entrance, there was a pair of menacingly looking “bouncers”, these carried out a thorough body search for weapons and drinks. You are only allowed in with your stomach and cash, the rest, you find them inside! Having got past the bouncers, we got to the Cash office and had to cough a cool 20K Ugandan shillings for Majestic Club instead of the ordinary that goes for a mere 7K shillings. Inside Majestic, the drinks are double the normal rate; the place is well carpeted with pure leather sofa sets. To be in a club in Mbarara, one has got to be very brave hearted! Most of the revellers of the opposite nature had very huge “sitting Rooms” with equally matching “transportation devices. That said and done, one is left in no doubt as to the presence of thieves in Mbarara; if not, how come almost all the ladies who took their clothes to the tailors, the latter always stole the cloth and only managed to make very tiny dresses that lacked the sleeves or were too short to even reach the knees! If it was not the case, then shoulders exposed, it was the legs above the knees or the “sitting rooms” were busy trying to seek for “liberation”(escape)! After all that has been taken into consideration, the majority of the ladies were very good from far but many of them far from good! How I wish Diaspoman was here, he would have spent the whole evening or night with an open mouth! Having got tired of taking beers, we decided to buy a John Walker Black Label; this kept us busy for the greater part of our presence. As for the ABCs of Vision Empire, justinvite me to the likes of Car Wash (new edition) or K Club or FoEyes and I will spill all the beans. As the morning broke, we retired to our small hotel located somewhere in Kizungu or Boma area. Little did we know that a surprise awaited us. As we got into bed, there was an “umucuranzi” (musician) who decided to start playing his “guitar” so loudly that we could hardly sleep. One of our colleagues went and knocked on the door to ask him tone down but he could not hear of that. East, West, Home is Best, we decided to leave Mbarara to its inhabitants and headed to Kigali!