Diaspoman: Isaac’s inspirational crusade versus Aggrey’s temptations

Life has become tough. Everywhere I turn; there is somebody who wants something from me. They all claim to be hungry and thirsty. They ask me for some coins not knowing that my pockets are gaping wide in real hunger. As my pockets cry out in hunger so does my throat wail out for a cold bottle of Amstel beer. I look at these people around me and feel sorry for them. At least for me, I have a slim chance of getting some quid from my buddies in town such as Aggrey himself. But today is a lot tougher. Aggrey is not in town. His friends are not answering my beeps. I need cash so much. As I walked along the Nyarutarama road wondering what my next move would be, I met some old friends who appeared to be in such a hurry. Where were they rushing to? Oh yes! We are going to be very rich, they responded. I probed for more information until they revealed to me that they were going to the stadium to receive miracles that would transform them from poor lads into rich bosses? You see brother, Jesus is the answer!? They were heading for the Amahoro Stadium to meet a Pastor all the way from Uganda. His name is Pastor Isaac Kiwewesi of the famous Miracle Center. The name rang a bell in my mind. Wasnt? This the rich Kampala Pastor whose wedding last year cost more than $160,000 dollars? Yeah! This is the person who spent almost ten thousand dollars for a wedding cake. His wedding was the talk of the nation when 30,000 invited guests crammed into the Mandela Nambole Stadium to witness the once famous bachelor tie the knot with Barbra Sasha. Wow, now I remember. This could be something worth attending. Besides, the Diaspoman has been on a bride search for such a long time indeed. If Pastor Isaac Kiwewesi was able to find himself a suitable bride, why not me! So I got all excited and offered to join my friends for this important crusade. Since these fellows were also very broke, we had no choice but to walk all the way from Nyarutarama to the Stadium in Remera. By the time we were approaching the Kisimenti traffic lights, I could hardly walk! I was so exhausted. I regretted why I never took advice from Aggrey about attending the Gym more regularly. Anyways, I persisted and somehow made it to the Stadium with my friends. There was such a big crowd! It was as if Amavubi football players were about to play in the World Cup final! Phew! Within seconds, I had already lost my colleagues. They had all disappeared through the huge crowd in a bid to catch glimpse of the famous Pastor. The choir from Uganda was performing. Instruments like keyboards, drums and guitars were all at work. It was really electric! Then it was time for preaching. Pastor Isaac Kiwewesi was at his best. As he spoke, I could feel all my problems were ebbing away. Today was a day for answers. Today was a day for a miracle. Tonight, I will go to sleep a poor man but tomorrow will bring me all riches like you have never seen before. At the end of the crusade, we all walked back to our respective places of residence. I walked all the way back to Aggrey? His home in Nyarutarama. I promised myself that in the morning, I would claim the miracles and become a self sustaining guy who will no longer live off from Aggreys!Mercy. The next morning, I woke up very fresh. My mind was at rest and my throat was no longer craving for a cold drink. I sent an SMS to Aggrey to tell him about my transformation? I met a man by the names of Pastor Isaac Kiwewesi. He has shown me the light. I am now a new creature men!? Of course Aggrey was not amused at all. And like the devil himself, he declared on phone? Diaspoman! I bet 100k! When I come back to Rwanda next week, you will not resist my offer of an outing at Big Club? Okay, the bet is on. I now seriously await Aggrey? His return. He will try to tempt me to visit the Big Club night spot. And if I refuse, then 100k is mine. So will it be the booze or the 100k? Only time will tell? Contact: diaspoman@yahoo.com