Having war at home with the drama-queen

While I attended one of the frequent house-parties which are thrown by people who have just shifted from their parent’s home that usually have more security than “Alcatraz”, I couldn’t help but shudder at a man who was being tongue-lashed by a date he had carried along. It wasn’t one of those eye-rolling, hands-clapping and swearing scenarios. I witnessed horror. She was assuring him how he was a good-for-nothing dude, he didn’t care about her and she has eventually come to the realization that he’s the wrong man for her. All this, she did without raising her voice almost like a whisper and all the while sipping on her drink and munching on some snacks. Call it a “dignified quarrel”. I have no idea what the poor soul had done to go through such a situation, but it would be absurd that even in this era there some men who go into relationship having no clue on how to handle women with an unusual temperament. Most people, will side with women when it comes to assuring a man but if men can’t handle a woman with a mild-temperament, what about many fire-spitting women out there waiting on the right man? There’s a power struggle for everything that is going on which has left men hopeless like the dude at the party.I wonder how a man can deal with such a woman at the same time keeping it cool. One moment she’s all lovey-dovey. The next moment, she looks like she’s jumped out of a vampire diaries scene ready to suck blood out of the man. Three ideas come to mind, “bolt” and live in fear for the rest of your life, return fire with fire or learn how to deal with the animal inside her. Most definitely, for real men, the first two options are out of the picture. If you run, where is the finishing line? Return fire with fire, then most probably all the so-called women activists (her friends) are going to have a field day dragging you to court (family meetings) on “verbal harassment” charges. That leaves one option; playing the brain-game. In his 1697 play “The Mourning Bride” William Congreve said; “hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.” Am not saying women are the worst creatures ever but anger seems to be one of the most powerful emotions that women possess. Their anger button is easy to turn on like their mood-swings. Usually, irritation, being upset, pressure, rejection, hopelessness or frustration can easily act as a stimulant to their anger. Many times, men think that women are being emotional; wrong. If men took time to understand the cause of the eruptions, it would help in figuring out how to deal with them. The deal lies in learning how to be part of her daily life one way or the other. For those who don’t know how a kitchen looks like, at least know that there’s such a word as boiling hot-90 per cent. Now this word can describe her situation before she pours magma on you. When heating milk, one will carry it off the charcoal stove in order for it not to pour. Use the same system, once your antennas detect a bad signal coming through, just switch off before disaster strikes. This has many meanings. You have to figure out a damage control technique to use before all hell breaks loose. Probably, you might want to give her time to calm down before resolving your issues. Or, use your wit; sympathy and consideration to help the situation. This might appear as a sign of weakness on a man’s side considering that men are groomed not to back away from arguments, but you are the winner here. You’ve lost, yes, but isn’t it better not to start a war that you can’t win? To stay away from arguments starts with identifying the cause. Once the problem is identified, it becomes easier to deal with and soon the rough animal within her turns into a gentle soul. This is easy to maintain. Be communicative and by no means avoid her concerns.Don’t be deceived; differences and fury are a part of relationships. Nonetheless, with constant consideration and spending time with your partner, be rest assured that the fire will soon be out, peace will prevail and you will regain your territory.