Not Before Marriage (NBM)

There was a soap opera I used to watch at a tender age which depicted young people and how they live their lives. Some wasted themselves by engaging in sexual relationships while at school which later landed them into unwanted pregnancies, STDs and other consequences that come with premature sex. However, at that age did not take time to think deeply about this soap opera not until recently when somehow it crossed my mind and I remembered this TV programme. ‘’Not Before Marriage’’ was the catch phrase commonly used in this drama series. I have come to learn what this exactly meant. They were simply meaning that engaging oneself in sexual intercourse is something that should be unheard of. Therefore, sexual purity was paramount until that day when one says, ‘I do.’ Looking back into our culture and norms, sex was too sacred and thus not something one could just disregard. For example, a girl who kept herself sexually pure was rewarded after it had been found out that she was a virgin. Sex before marriage was prohibited, it was immoral. When one upholds their virginity till they marry or get married, it gives ideas to the partner that they are trustworthy. That they waited patiently for each other, this is something that brings pride that one who upheld themselves till they are married. There is no reason whatsoever as to why one should or must have sex before marriage. This makes it lose the whole meaning; people have different ideologies about not having sex before marriage. A friend of mine Claire said, “I would never get married to a guy I have never ‘slept’ with because I need to know how well or bad he is when it comes to making love.” Fortunately, she is not the only one who thinks this way. However, a point ponder on is how it would feel if a guy said no and went NBM, waiting patiently for marriage, would not that be true love? After all, if someone says they love another then they have to be patient with the other partner till marriage so that you explore whatever had never been discovered. Therefore, keep that gift wrapped till that person who deserves it puts a ring on your finger. I suppose it gives the two a great new experience and journey of discovery. jacqueuwera@yahoo.com