Rachel’s Ramblings:Men, careful what you say during a fight

It is a bonafide fact that all couples fight, some of them more times than they are actually in bliss. However, the words exchanged during a fight can lengthen or shorten the ordeal. Women are a very sensitive species and do not take too kindly to the insensitivity some men possess. For starters, do not tell a woman she is overreacting. When it comes to stressing a point, there is no such thing as overreacting. Sure, she is probably throwing tantrums over the waitress you politely winked at for service at dinner but to her, it wasn’t polite. In fact, it was downright flirtatious! So telling her not to overreact just won’t cut it. Women appreciate being heard. She needs to know that what she is telling you is registering in your head. Therefore, unless you want a hard smack across the face, under no circumstance should you say ‘Sorry love I got distracted. What were you saying?’ Not only will she smack you, but you will also watch as the couch becomes your new resting place without so much as a pillow or a shawl to keep the cold away. Never ever, pause her tantrum. Let her get it over with. Things like ‘Hold on. Let me get a beer’ simply anger her the more—moreover, the more the anger, the longer the tantrum. Men should let a spouse spill her heart out without any interruptions lest the beer you fetched ends up colliding with your head! One thing guaranteed to tick off any woman is the assumption men have that every time she quarrels about something she is either in her period or about to enter it. Yes that time of the month can really bring out those vicious hormones but it does not mean that every time she throws a tantrum it is the ‘red robot’ responsible. Men love their soccer. Fact. And yes, women do pick the worst time to start a fight. Asking her if the fight can be carried on after a game will surely leave you sleeping outside. She needs to know she is more important than soccer and putting her on hold to watch a game is no way to prove her prominence. Also, never underestimate how mad she is. Do not assume her protest is a prank because in the end, the joke will be on you for sure. ‘You are actually mad? I thought you were kidding.’ Kidding? This is not candid camera please. She is serious. Showing her, you are just as mad works better than mistaking her for a standup comedian. Finally yet important, whatever you do, do not mention the word sex. She is not interested in naughty rendezvous; she wants answers to your shady behaviour earlier. Some men think sex is the answer to everything and that every time a woman blows noise all they have to do is give her the suggesting look. Some problems are bigger than others are and couples must find out just how big the current situation is before suggesting what could possibly be the death of you. I am just saying. Remember too, an apology does not cost a thing even when you feel she is just being silly. It doesn’t mean you are sucking up to her, it just means you truly value her and that if taking the blame or accepting a mistake like a man will get her to shut up then so be it. After all, a happy woman means a slower aging rate for you. Go figure! rachelgaruka@yahoo.co.uk