Learn from the past, deal with the present and hope for the future

I once read in a magazine about a woman who said she had no regrets in life and I wondered if that was even possible. She spoke of everything that had happened in her life, choosing to look at the good things as blessings and the bad ones as experience. Now, more than ever, I feel like that is the most sensible thing I’ve ever heard. I mean for how long can one live with regret? And does regret change anything anyway? The best way to deal with the past is by learning from it and knowing what not to do the next time around. In relationships we often torment ourselves with the ghosts of a spouse’s past. It is natural to wonder about an ex or if the previous relationship was anything like the existing one. Unless you and your companion lived in solitary for the past 20 years, you both came into your liaison with a history — one that didn’t involve each other. What then is the point in digging up old wounds? It’s fine to be open about prior relationships and how they affected and influenced you but once you’ve had those conversations, let them go. Move on as best in the relationship as you can and don’t waste time dotting on the past; life is too short for that. Looking for guaranteed compatibility is preposterous! Whatever it is that happened in the past should not be an excuse to live the present recklessly. It could have been a motor accident that left someone dead or an abortion that you wish you never had or even the way you treated another person. Find a way to learn from all that and live life as best as you can with those past mistakes as a guide to what won’t happen again. Dealing with the present comes from how well you dealt with the past. Problems will call for your attention from time to time. The trick is to know when to turn the spotlight away from them—and onto something good and positive. Sometimes we tend to feel like there is no way out of a problem but there is always a way. Like the saying goes, where there’s a will, there’s a way. If you have the will to do something, the way will always be there. Try living without the pressure of keeping up a good image. Nothing kills the joys of life like pretending to be who you are not. Being you is very important because people will love you for that and not for the person they think you are. When we are out trying to be what and who we are not, we miss our potential because we are too busy trying to reach someone else’s. You’re entire life will pass you by and by the time you realize that you actually lived a life that wasn’t yours, it is too late. Do all that you would in your routine life on your way to enlightenment. When you awaken, you will realize that the world is the same—it is you who has changed. Don’t let it get to that. The best way to deal with the present is to ask for divine intervention in your life. Asking for God’s guidance on how best to go through the day and the ones that follow is a great way to deal with present life. We are what God says we are and we can do what He says we can do. The sky is the limit for anybody who can grab onto the present and maximize it to their full potential. We need to realize that everything occurs in the present moment, and that very moment is all that exists. The past and future exist but everything is happening in the present moment - right here, right now. The present moment contains a true reality that the past and future can never possess, because they can only be held in the here and now. The past is always just a memory. When we remember something from the past, it is just that - something remembered. The future, on the other hand, is imagination. The future is what we hope and pray for. It is like a dream; not real but something that could be if we only put our minds to it. Allow yourself to experience the pure bliss of everything being complete and whole, right here and right now. You can do this by not trying to fight life or suffering. If you can flow with life, then the suffering will disappear. You will understand that life is perfect and realize that pain and pleasure will pass but what remains the same is the witnessing of them. rachelgaruka@yahoo.co.uk