Insight: Too busy for love

Those who are perpetually single know not to dwell upon one question. Yet at some point, the one thing that must be answered is the one thing staring us right in the face, ‘why am I single?’ Many women are too busy trying to make it in this man driven world that they forget all about their love life. Climbing the ladder to success is just superb but what good will it be in the end when there’s no one to share it with? That is what success is about; to be able to achieve something and have people around to help celebrate that success. Waking up every morning with no one to pray for the day that awaits us and coming back to an empty house with no one to share the highlights of the day, is something no woman wants so why do some women find themselves single year in year out? Women with the most impressive of CV’s find themselves in this predicament not because they want to but because they are too busy getting the job done. If she’s not scrambling around the place to meet one of her many deadlines, she’s organizing business trips and gallivanting through Africa. The schedule some women have is enough to scare even the greatest of Casanovas away. For instance, she gets up at 4:00 a.m, and is at work by 6:00 a.m. Every second at work is spent in meetings and trying to beat deadlines. Her work extends all the way to 9:00 p.m, sometimes. As if that is not enough, she does not make it easier on herself by letting loose and smiling once in a while. What is there to smile about with a schedule that hectic? Still, that smile could encourage a brother to step up and ask her out on date. In general, the woman does not have a second to just feel free and take a breath. In the movie The Proposal, Sandra Bullock acts as Margaret Tate, an extremely ‘socially retarded’, monstrous New York editor who on the brink of being deported (as she was a Canadian with an expired visa) decides to blackmail her ambitious but equally devious assistant Andrew Paxton (Ryan Reynolds) into marrying her so she can stay in the country. A slightly nervous Andrew agrees to the plot but not without making his own demands seeing as he is, facing five years in prison and a USD$250,000 fine. All he wants is to be an editor and have his book published, which is what he left his home for (wealthy if I may add) to pursue his dreams. Like most romantic movies have it, the two end up falling in love. But it is Margaret’s confession about why she was single all those years that we are trying to connect with here. She worked her way to the top in the land of infinity opportunities without so much as a scratch on her resume. As much as she worked hard, she did not have a fraction of a life outside the office. Fate intervened in a way she probably looked at as a curse. After spending a weekend at Andrew’s parent’s home in Alaska, Margaret comes to the realization that a gem has always been right before her every day for the last three years. Andrew was not just some kind of ‘Alaskan Kennedy’ he was also everything Margaret did not know people could be. Kind, funny, caring and considerate are some of the things she had long forgotten about and being around Andrew and his loving family just reminded her of the one thing she had missed all those years – love. In the end she was lucky to find it but not all women can say the same. Years later when friends call to celebrate wedding anniversaries and kids birthday parties, it then hits home how all those years went by and still we find ourselves alone only being referred to as the ‘favorite aunt’! rachelgaruka@yahoo.co.uk