Getting along with your parents

If you find talking to your parents or other adults in your life difficult or intimidating, don’t think there’s something wrong with you! You are not alone, a lot of young people find it so hard too, especially when it comes to certain subjects. This shouldn’t be the case; parents love it when you talk to them, even if something unimportant! In fact, they get worried when you just answer their questions and keep quiet, remember you are their kid, they love you and would like to hear how you spend your day, how you are doing at school among other things. Here are some ways to make talking to your parents easier. First choose the right time. Approach your parent when they are not busy with something else. Even the greatest parent will have a hard time listening to you if you catch them rushing to work! Find a time that you and your parents are comfortable and relaxed together. Show them respect by focusing your attention on the conversation, looking them in the eyes, and by not being sarcastic or rolling your eyes. Don’t talk while reading or replying sms’s on your phone or watching TV! Try to bring up something they are interested in. Ask them questions about their day. Parents love this! If you have something specific you want to talk about let them know exactly what it is. Don’t beat around the bush. If they react badly to what you tell them really listen to them. Don’t react back. Let them finish and don’t interrupt. When you feel like you’ve told them what you wanted to, thank them for listening. Remain respectful and keep your voice calm even if you’re upset. If you feel like there are still things that need to be talked about, set up another time to talk about it. When you are talking to them, be honest. Honesty builds trust. Stay cool. If you stay calm when things get heated up, you are showing maturity and your parents will respect that. Find something small to chat about each day. Talk about how your team did at the training. Share something one of your teachers said. Even small talk about what’s for dinner can keep your relationship strong and comfortable. If you have never or haven’t had a normal conversation with them for a long time, the good news is that it’s never too late to start. If you feel your relationship with your parents is strained, try easing into conversations. Mention that cute thing the dog did. Talk about how well your little sister is doing in math. Chatting with parents every day not only keeps an existing relationship strong, it also can help a worn relationship get stronger. When parents feel connected to your daily life, they can be there for you when something really important comes up. martin.bishop18@yahoo.com