Would you rather be the ‘Good’ or Gutsy woman?

At first glance, most ladies would rather be ‘good’ just like it was the case for most women back in the day. Times have changed. The current situation is nothing compared to the past where the role of bread winning was exclusively for men. If you look around the world today, the successful women in all fields are not ‘good’ but gutsy. In the perception of majority, a good woman is one who stays home to look after the kids, respectful to her husband, abides by his every word and keeps quiet most of the time. Most ‘good’ women wholly rely on their hubbies to provide their every need while they look after the family. The good woman is usually not updated about what’s happening around the world because she is confined to her home and therefore lacks exposure. The gutsy woman is courageous, daring and entrepreneurial. She won’t be afraid to stand up for her rights. She will not wait for her husband or boyfriend to cater to her every need. She will boldly execute her duties at her workplace or venture into businesses to improve her livelihood and that of her family. “So many women today have picked up the gutsy spirit. It’s rare to find women who sit at home and do nothing. It’s not bad to be good but its better to be gutsy. Even so, you can still be good and plucky,”says Aisha Kayitesi, who runs a hardware business in Nyabugogo.Kayitesi says that most women today are coerced by their husbands to stay home and do nothing but to give birth, cook food and take care of the children. Usually, men end up ill-treating such women and cheating on them. Innocent Musafiri, a father of four says that with the surging cost of living, he would support her wife to be the gutsy type who can audaciously step out in the world and work. “The good wife who just sits home is boring. You can’t hold an intellectual conversation with her unless of course you’re discussing Nigerian movies which we men are not interested in,”adds Musafiri. “Men should not torment their wives all in the name of being ‘good’. That kind of lifestyle should be left to the era of our forefathers. Besides, when a woman works then the couple can share expenses so the man doesn’t have to struggle alone,” adds Musafiri. Olivier Wanzinga, a working mother, says that ‘good’ women live the most miserable lives because they are despised and scorned by society’s perception of them. “Women have to be more daring and enterprising however, they should allow quality time for their children and husbands,” said Wazinga. Life is unpredictable. Some situations may call for bravery, courage and ability to be independent. Why suffer the ‘good’ girl syndrome yet the two can be balanced? m.kaitesi@yahoo.com