Living Life: Are You Good or Just Bad?

That is the question you would be asking yourself especially when others label them ‘bad’ or ‘good’. First there is no clear definition of a ‘good’ person or ‘bad’ person. These labels are themselves reflective of a small aspect of someone’s life although some individuals manage to attract an overall consensus of fitting these labels. For example, most people think Hitler was a bad man, in fact an evil man while they also view Sister Theresa as a good person, in fact a saintly person. I have come to think that there are not good or bad persons, that all humans have the potential to be evil or saintly. Children for example are viewed as untarnished and angelic when they come into this world, but that tag disappears slowly as they grow, pick up habits around them and eventually develop their own unique personalities. With hindsight, nobody can suppose that Hitler was good angelic child, but he must have been at some stage. However, each of us has a specific temperament. The word “temperament” itself comes from Latin “temperare”, “to mix”. This means that each person is a mixture of certain distinct characteristics that define how they behave, and react to situations around them. One theory defines human temperament into four categories. The Sanguine temperament personality is an extrovert, tend to enjoy being around people, making new friends, usually quite creative and often daydream. They also tend to be forgetful, talkative sometimes emotional. Cholerics have a lot of ambition can dominate people of other temperaments, especially phlegmatic types. Many great charismatic military and political figures were cholerics. Melancholic often very considerate can be highly creative often perfectionist, self-reliant and independent but sometimes they can get so self-centred. Phlegmatic tend to be self-content and kind, very accepting and affectionate, receptive and shy and often prefer stability to uncertainty and change, relaxed, rational, curious, and observant, making them good administrators. But can be very passive-aggressive. Although the scientific evolution of theories about human personality is still ongoing there is general agreement that each personality is usually one of the four temperaments or a mix of two of them. Note that each temperament has a positive and negative disposition. But most importantly, individual personalities make interesting fodder ordinary people like you. Key to any relationship be it work related, friendship, or romantic, is the ability to understand each other and know the buttons to press or not to press in certain situations. Long-lasting relationships are built on bridges that usually emanate from the ability of individuals to understand and connect their individual personalities to create a sort of magnetic effect. Good leaders may portray is as charisma or empathy. Some people are experts in summing up a person’s character, personality, or desires from the first five minute meeting through discreet but valued leads. Good lovers may show an instant connection and reading of each other’s minds even without saying anything. Some people are famous for having the sixth sense, the ability to know things before they happen while others have very strong gut feelings. This mishmash of human emotions and behaviour is the variety in the sea of temperaments that is out there. Depending on how you approach a person, how they are brought up, or the circumstances around a person, someone may appear ‘very bad’ but before you pass judgment try to see beneath the veneer of ‘badness’ to see its cause. kelviod@yahoo.com