My visit to fellow Diaspomen across the border ended in a bit of frustration when my Valentine showed me the true cost of love. I decided to board the Kampala bound bus on my way to Uganda, I was quite lucky to hook up with a nice looking Diaspochick; she snatched my heart and I offered her my seat! This was my chance to hook a Diaspo valentine. To win her heart, I tried to portray myself as a big Kigali-based shot travelling for a serious business meeting in Kampala. But how could a whole boss travel by road instead of flying? Ah! You see I happen to have this phobia of airplanes. And besides, would I have gotten this chance of meeting someone as nice as you? Yea yea! I was scoring points very fast. I could sense that I was winning the Diaspochick for a valentine in Kampala city. When we arrived at the Kampala bus park, I started to curse out loud! “I called my office in Kampala to send me a Benz! Where are they?” Then I dialled several fake numbers on my phone. “Nobody is picking up! Anyway we can use a taxi. Can I offer you a drink?” she accepted. So I asked the taxi driver to take us to Ntinda where we would enjoy drinks and pork. To my surprise, the lady pleaded with me that she had always dreamt of visiting the posh Serena Hotel in Kampala. I was cooked wondering where I was going to raise the cash from! That place is damn expensive! But without hesitating, I found myself confessing the same, “You know what! I too have always wanted to visit Serena!” Before long, the taxi was swerving inside through the Serena gates. I realized what trouble I had landed myself into when the menu was brought over to our table. I could feel the heart beat vibrating out from my throat as my valentine kept ordering for a very expensive wine. “Please give me a glass of Cabernet sauvignon and then mix some doses of Pinot Noir and Syrah” Phew! I just settled for a bottle of Tusker beer. Pretending to be in love with my new valentine, the truth of the matter is that I was stuffed with anger and venom. This was not part of the plan! I thought we would sit at the Ntinda roadside bars and gulp some Bell beers accompanied with roasted pork. But alas, it was not! As I slowly sipped my Tusker, the Diaspochick said she wanted to go dancing, “Please let’s go to Silk Royale!” Like a sheep being led to the slaughter house, I found myself heading to Silk Royale Discotheque. Thanks to the organisers, it was ladies night so I just had to raise entrance fees for myself. The chick was always a step ahead of me. Every time I turned around, she would be hanging up on a stool at the counter guzzling like there was no tomorrow. After drinking to her fill, she whispered in my ear; “Go to the car and I will join you in 3 minutes,” I said to her. Indeed, I rushed out and sat in the taxi patiently waiting for my Valentine. After about 5 minutes, I spotted her coming out of the discotheque. She was not alone! Beside her was this rich looking guy who had a round pot beer belly for a stomach! Before I could dash out, the couple was entering the sleek posh Benz and heading away through the cold night. I was just left flabbergasted and disgusted! That, to me was a true cost of love… Contact: diaspoman@yahoo.com
