“New Year’s Resolutions”

As we ushered in the year, many people were busy making this or that resolution wholesale. I first heard of this strange term “new year’s resolution” about two decades or so ago, people were religiously trying to make this or that resolution as the New Year is being ushered in. There was this guy whose affinity for members of the opposite gender was second to none; he was likely to con anything that looks like the same. Going by the history and physiological conditions of the guys from around the slopes of Mt. Elgon, they are said to be no nonsense guys! Word has it that, he would sometimes go to bed a “good boy”, but later in the night, he would have a funny dream (you know what I mean), there and then, he would wake up and head for the “love market” to buy himself a “quencher” to sooth him to sleep again. Many times before heading home, he branched off to the “love market” to buy a one for the road before going home. This fella knew his problem very well; he tried to find a solution in the New Year’s resolution. One day, precisely, on the last day of the year, he decided to kiss his old habit good bye. He made a resolution that, in the new year being ushered in, he was going to be a “saint” in as far as “away matches” were concerned. Come the night of 31st December, he went for the “two year’s dance”. This dance is called so because, it begins in one year and end in the next and hence the name “two years”. I am not trying to be sacrilegious, but just as was the case, on the night Our Lord Jesus was about to be arrested by his enemies, he told one of his most faithful disciples that, before the cock crows, the disciple would have denied knowledge of the Lord three times and so it came to be! In this case, As soon as the year was ushered in, this gentleman was busy ushering it in style to the extent that, he had trace-passed onto “privatized property” and was caught “red handed”. This brings me to the conclusion that, making any new year’s resolution is just a mere farce. So many people resolve never to smoke again or never to touch any more alcohol etc but then, in the short run; they err and forget their resolutions only to fall back into their old habits or even worse. Have you made any resolutions? Watch out, making resolutions that you may not fulfil is synonymous to deceiving oneself. Did you know? Much as the English celebrate Christmas, Easter etc, the French do not do so but chose to celebrate the New Year’s Day. The French are very staunch Catholics but cannot bring themselves to celebrate the two most important Christian days because they were first celebrated by the English. The English on their part do not celebrate New Year’s Day because the French celebrate it. Is this not very funny? Yet, we African are busy “Xeroxing” (copying) everything the, kweli, hu ni hungwana? There are African Americans but no African Europeans, the writing is on the wall. Let us learn to be ourselves, fill stop. I, on my part, have made a resolution to continue writing this nonsense until I become past tense (either by human actions or nature)! Happy New Year to you all! mfashumwana@fastmail.fm