…carry bags full of things they do not need. Here, women beat the men hands down. That does not stop me from hating them. But don’t get confused, please. The Hater likes women but hates the ones who carry bags that are almost bigger than them. What on earth do you put in those bags? These bags are actually too big to be called handbags. Last week I saw a lady with a very huge handbag I actually think she had carried all her valuable property in the bag so that just in case her house caught fire in her absence, nothing precious would be lost. I know there is something called trends but sometimes you just end up looking like the casual labourers that carry heavy bags in the taxi park. …load their wallets with all sorts of things other than money. Even in hating I try to be gender sensitive. Therefore allow me to broadcast my extreme hatred for all those broke men who carry huge wallets that are simply full of old newspapers, and business cards instead of money. Just take a look at the men as you walk on the street you will see the ones I am talking about. They actually look disabled as the bulging wallet in the back pocket looks like someone has pushed three pocket bibles in one pocket making their buttocks to appear uneven. Please, ladies don’t be fooled by these jokers. My research has proved that the bigger the wallet the less money you are likely to find in it. …still have no problem wearing torn socks in 2010. I have nothing against men today but the ones who still wear ‘ventilated’ socks cannot survive my rage. The fact that some men continue to wear their socks until they become old enough to develop holes is very disgusting for some of us. Although they are considered to be underwear you still have to know that at one point you may be expected to remove your shoes thus exposing your poverty to the rest of the world. Instead of teasing your feet with holed socks I suggest you just wear sandals or stay home. At least I won’t hate you that much. …call just to ask you where you are. I think I should start a school teaching phone etiquette. But first I have to announce my extreme hatred for people who call and all they have to say is, “Where are you?” Are you spying on me? Listen, I am above 18 and I am not lost. It is not a crime to own a mobile phone and you should not stalk me with questions about my location. Because it’s a mobile phone it means I could be anywhere where there is a phone signal. Why don’t you try calling the customer care service and ask them to help you locate one of their subscribers. …think the abbreviation ‘LOL’ is some kind of punctuation. It’s a pity that the advent of internet and Facebook was not preceded with any lessons on netiquette (decent behaviour while on the internet). Some people with vacationing brains just carelessly use ‘LOL’ after each and every statement when chatting or commenting on Facebook. I know a brainless fellow who wrote, “My mum is very sick, lol!” Do such fools know that the abbreviation stands for laughing out loud? There is nothing funny about your mum being sick. It just proves that you are the one suffering from a chronic mental disorder! My only interest in your mental deficiencies and ignorance is that I get to hate you today. Let me help you hate by sending your suggestions to thehater2009@gmail.com or a text message to +250 788 545293 The Hater
