I hate people who…

…squeeze themselves in spaces where they cannot fit. I am starting to accept the bitter truth that travelling by public means was never meant to be pleasurable. People’s behaviour in these things called taxis leaves me with so much hate. I hate these fat people who insist on sitting where they clearly cannot fit. All they do is inconvenience those of us who are unlucky to share the seat with them. The other day I almost called the police to report a case of attempted murder. These two fat women sat beside me and were really squeezing life out of me. I could hardly breathe or even move. Please, think about your size before you torture the rest of us next time. …easily get upset over small things at parties. For some reason men do not ever seem to suffer from this problem and so I will reserve my hatred for the ladies. Yes you can say there is no gender balance in my hate activities but I do not care. I hate all those ladies who get upset when they go for a party and find someone wearing the same dress like theirs. Why should you get angry over such a thing? Dresses are made to be worn. Oh I thought when you bought it in the shop you left similar dresses waiting to be bought. Ok if you are so angry, why not remove your dress so that you can be in Eve’s birth suit (naked). That way I am sure no one else will be wearing your outfit. …baptise their cheap mobile handsets names of cool phones. Is it not obvious that some people are not priests and therefore don’t have the powers to baptise anyone or anything? I just hate these jokers who buy cheap Chinese handsets but go on telling people that they have a Blackberry or Iphone. Please, stop fooling yourselves because everyone can tell the difference. Surely if you owned a Blackberry why do you continue beeping me? And by the way I now hear some people talking about something called a Tigoberry! What is this nonsense? Tigo does not manufacture phones and not berries of any kind. …send me Facebook friend requests without profile pictures. This nonsense of someone requesting to be my friend but without a profile picture must stop. I hate it and one of these days I will create a virus to destroy the computers of such jokers. Why don’t you want to put your face when even Osama bin Laden puts his face on TV? All my friends have faces and if you are not proud of yours then I suggest you look for other people like you. I am tired of having to check on the mutual friends to see if I know you. And besides I am The Hater. Who even told you that I want to be your friend? …always complain about Monday. Why do people quickly forget how desperate they were before they got their current jobs? I extremely hate people who always complain about working on Monday as if they have just known that the day is part of every week. Why don’t you look for a job that does not require you to work on Monday? I don’t even know which job falls in that category apart from being an altar boy in church on Sundays. The annoying thing is that if Monday was removed then these jokers will complain about Tuesday. Let Monday be, it’s just another day with 24 hours. I love Monday because I spend it relaxing after hating on Sunday. Let me help you hate by sending your suggestions to thehater2009@gmail.com or a text message to +250 788 545293.