TRUE MAN

There is nothing wrong with a man who loves his mother. Rather, in my opinion, there is everything right with such a man. It is only natural that a man feels love for someone who is responsible for bringing him into this world. Even closer than a father, a mother has a special connection with her children. From the time he is her womb, even after he is born, he owes his sustenance to that particular woman; his mother. I would find a man who doesn’t love his mother very disturbing. Unless there is a case of severe personal disagreement, there is no reason why a man shouldn’t be close to his mom. In a way, it is a sign of a man’s capability to love and be loved by a female. A woman who consorts with a man who has issues with his mother shouldn’t be surprised if she one day finds her husband turning against her too. A common misconception is that a man who loves his mother tends to fail to relate normally/adequately with his wife/girlfriend, because his mother will always come between the two of them. The common term given to such a man is “mommy’s boy”. But aren’t we all mummy’s boys to some extent? Can a man ever totally do away with his mother from his heart and mind? How can you fail to be attached to the one woman who loves you unconditionally? However, don’t be fooled. Too much of anything is bad. While all of us love our mother’s cooking, it is NOT the only cooking we can eat. A man who fails to realize that time has reached for him to set up house outside his mother’s to find and build his life around another woman who isn’t his mother is a sign of something terribly gone wrong. If he always needs to consult his mother before making any decision, constantly harasses you about how “inferior your housekeeping is, compared to his mother’s”, runs to his mother whenever there is a slight disagreement, constantly compares everything you do to “how my mother does it”, etc, you have a man suffering from a condition known as: “Failure to Launch”. Simply put, he is not yet mature enough to leave the protective wing of his mother, he still desires to be his mother’s little boy. Most of the time, the mother plays a very larger part in this complex. Some men may outgrow this, some never do, unfortunately. “Agiye konka”; that is said of a man who has gone to visit his parents. It loosely translates to; “he has gone to breastfeed”. It is a good-natured term that isn’t offensive but rather shows that the connection between a man and his mother is always strong, no matter how big he grows, how far he goes. Love for a mother is a sign of a true man and not weakness. Women should accept this value in any man because if they are not afraid to let it show then they won’t be afraid to show their woman real love. After all, she brought you into this world, didn’t she? shemmugisha@gmail.com