As we were beginning to nurse our wounds at the expense of the “Chain Keepers’” joy, the rotations of the earth that mark days, days into months and months into years, clocked the 1461 day mark. Ok, don’t worry, simple mathematics states that, every year comprises approximately 365 and a quarter days, after four years, that would add up to the number above. You may be wondering as to what lies behindall this mathematics, nothing! It’s just the anticipated “madness” of men coming from 32 so called great nations of this planet, assembling in one of the so called participants, getting involved in a frenzy exercise of kicking a leather object (many love to call the ball) around a playground for not less than ninety minutes per session. This time around, the madness that had evaded us has now come to our beloved continent in the theme of “Go Africa”! That said and done, most chain keepers are on their knees praying to the Almighty Nyagasani to make the tournament pass faster than it started. Believe you me, majority of the men love the “World Cup” because it is the single excuse that they can all use to “prison break” away from their sometimes nagging chain keepers! Men always love their “matches” especially when they will be played on “away” grounds. Who wouldn’t? After running from the sometimes nagging chain keepers and the prospect of applying the FIAM (Federation of International Away Matches) an affiliate of FIFA, once you score on “an away” ground, one goal counts as two! Just the other day, my friend Gafaranga (not a real soccer fan), was vehemently arguing with his wife that, he had to go and watch the World Cup soccer on a big screen with friends. We, who know him well, know that, he can never tell Wayne Rooney from Anelka or Christian Ronaldo! We went to watch the opening match at Carwash. As usual, the chain keeper decided to accompany him. As we were busy watching the match between South Africa and Mexico, he kept shouting, “Ronaldo arimo akina neza” (Ronaldo is playing well); as said earlier, he could not differentiate South Africa from Mexico or Brazil. His sole purpose was to show his wife that, he was deeply interested in the matches. We sat through the first and second matches. By the time the second one ended, his wife was bored stiff; you can only guess as to whether she will ever come back to watch other matches! Surely, at the end of the last match of the night (England Vs Uruguay), he did not want to leave, he was demanding that, the TV guys should show another one! We begged him to leave since his madam was tired and needed to rest. Reluctantly, he left for home. The next day,invited the chain keeper for the day’s matches, guess what? She did not want to even hear the word “world cup”. True, Gafaranga had liberated himself from the “tight security” of the chain keeper. Guess what? On the next day, Gafaranga did not surface anywhere near the scenes that screen World Cup. Since he had thrown the chain keeper off his trails, only the sky was the limit. This did not come at a small price; he had to sit through two gruelling matches, pretend to love it all even when he may have been more bored than his chain keeper! The end result could be total “Uhuru” during the whole season. Most likely, he is a free man till the middle of July! mfashumwana@fastmail.fm
