How do you tell she is cheating?

When Joshua went for a six months training course in Nairobi, his fiancée started getting busy and not available whenever he called, she could give all sorts excuses for not picking his calls, poor guy was so understanding. “I know you work too hard,” he would say. “I never suspected she could cheat on me, the very day I came back, we talked, had fun and did all things that lovers do, when she went to fix us something to eat, out boredom I checked massages in her phone to see if she kept some of the sweet SMS’s I used to send her, (for I had kept all hers) that’s when I was struck! I was hit by hot love messages my girl sent her new catch , she had sent the ‘other guy’ loads of short massages telling him how much she loves him and informing him how ‘the looser’ is soon coming back, referring to me, she had also changed my contact name from ‘Honey’ to ‘Brother Joshua,”, he narrated Reasons You don’t need to hire a spy, or undercover agent to nab her, I know a guy who sent his friend to ‘spy and tempt’ his girl friend, he even facilitated the dude. The spy took her out, but also fell in love with her, he confessed and revealed everything to her, and she dumped both of them with a thud! Before you seek to net her, you should first understand how men and women treat infidelity; generally men are known to cheat for sexual pleasure only. While this is a part of why women cheat, the reason is more complex, women cheat for variety of reasons. Most leading causes are, ‘taking her for granted’. Lack of trust and vengeance are also on the list of what causes women in most relationships to cheat. Most women cheat to fill a void that is in their current relationship, she may be looking for someone who is a better listener, someone who enjoys the same hobby or someone who doesn’t expect sex everyday. Many times you hear women complain “He doesn’t know how to talk to me, he doesn’t listen, my friend listens better”, they complain. “I know my man loves me, but he doesn’t know how to love me, I feel so cold, empty and lonely even when he is around” a lady friend one day confided. When a woman feels she’s unheard, not responded to, or uncared for, she’ll look for that warmth and affection somewhere else, though there are some women who are money minded and will cheat no matter how tenderly you treat them. So, the difference in reasoning behind the unfaithfulness means she will show different signs of cheating than a man would. She is cheating Women naturally are emotional; they enjoy kissing, holding hands, cuddling, if she’s cheating this will change, women get emotional about disloyalty, she’ll spend much time thinking of ways of dealing with both affairs, this will trigger many guilty feelings, she’ll feel uncomfortable around you and will constantly avoid your affection. Another sign that she is cheating is when she begins to tell you less about her and turn full focus on you, women like talking about their days, they love sharing many details, if your woman is hesitant or finding it hard to share details about her day or provide a one sentence answer or change the subject, sniff the air. Her physical appearance hits the chart, she used to wear little or no make-up, now she spends hours in front of the mirror, different expensive colognes hit her dressing table, nice, sexy out fits replaced the t-shits and jeans even when going to the supermarket or to visit an old untie. She Switches off her phone when it’s ringing, it’s not that she wants to give you undivided attention, she jumps to pick it up when it rings, she keeps it on herself all the time, every time you lay a hand on it she grabs it from you pretending to look for a contact. Call her when she out with her ‘so called cousin’ tell her ‘I love you’ and listen to her tone when she replies. Holding hands is socially acceptable; if she doesn’t pull back you will sense nervousness or rigidity when you hold her cheating hand. The boyfriends are always the last one to know; chances are all her friends know she’s being unfaithful to you, they will feel guilty and uncomfortable around you, so, most of them will avoid you. She no longer needs your time, she doesn’t mind you spending countless hours with the boys, infact she doesn’t seem to notice your absence at all, and if you think you finally won the freedom of watching the entire soccer match uninterrupted? You better think again. All Lovey-dovey out of the blue, she showers you with love and gifts, she no longer gets angry at you, if you think she was touched by an angel? You might be right. Martin.bishop18@yahoo.com

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How do you tell she is cheating?