I hate people who…

…attend parties when they have not been invited. The Hater really cherishes attending a good party. Sometimes I almost fail to write this column because of parties. Each time I am attending parties, I find myself hating those who show up without invitation. How many times do I have to remind you that free things no longer exist? If you have not been invited to a party I suggest that you stay home and try out some of your hobbies. Do not inconvenience us who were invited. Actually if you tried staying away, the food and drinks may be enough for the guests. Try that for once. …think that raising their voices raises their arguments. When I decided to make some money from hating unserious human beings, some of them seem to have made it a nagging habit to do stupid things. I really have a lot of anger for these people who think that by shouting, they can win an argument. An argument can only be won with referenced facts and clear reasoning. Shouting can only help to amplify your ignorance and weak manners. If shouting was the way to argue and talk then the soft speakers would be daft. Once you have nothing constructive to say, only your silence can be a better option. People with this habit should know that these days I do beat. …spread computer viruses with their flash disks. When prices for flash disks or memory sticks started going down I thought it was good for society. I have now realised that there are so many flash disk owners and this number is almost equal to the viruses they spread. For that reason, I hate people who bring their cheap Chinese-made flash disks to my time tested laptop and all they offer me is a new type of deadly virus. I am tired of having to deal with these viruses you bring along with your flash disks. All I asked for was the word or PDF file not the virus. Next time, try and find good anti-virus software and if it all fails then I might as well suggest a condom for your flash disk! …only send me hugs and kisses through sms! Please fellows; I am a grown man who you should not try playing tricks with. I am really tired of my female friends who only think of me when they are bored with their cheap phones. These unserious girls never hesitate to tell me how they are thinking of me and how much they love me apparently. What really annoys me is that they conclude their text messages with the over used line of hugs and kisses. How the hell am I supposed to receive these hugs and kisses? Please try to send me some mobile money at least. My Nokia is not about to start hugging me or even kissing me. I hate fake things including hugs and kisses. …get so angry when the English team they support loses a match. What is this crap I am hearing of people getting so mad simply because Chelsea or Arsenal has lost a football game? Please give me a break. Who said that these teams were unbeatable? I thought we all agreed that in a game there is always a winner and a loser. Do you think that the other teams came onto the pitch to lose? Get a life please, and stop boring us with your silly whining. And besides, the last time I checked you were a Rwandan and not a Briton, so why are you stressing us thus. I am sure that those footballers you support don’t even know that you stay in a place called Nyamirambo! Let me help you hate by sending your suggestions to thehater2009@gmail.com or a text message to + 250 758 545293.