“Blessed are the Villagers”

Sometimes, I wonder why I ever left the village for the so called town life! Don’t get me wrong, there are lots of goodies out of town life, like me the Villager being on Face Book, owning a BlackBerry (not a b1ack berry) phone and all that goes with it. What if there was no village, would there have ever been any Villager? Maybe this columnwould have been going for a different name or not in existence at all, who knows? Sometimes I wonder where we are heading to! So many things are being done in the name of urbanisation, I suppose, many of our elders are put to shame by some of these ways. The other day, I escorted a friend of mine to Nyagatare, we were going for a “gusaba” (bride seeking). This has no direct bearing to what happened but one could say that, it had a sort of effect. In the olden days, our fore fathers used to marry out of necessity and not out of choice; they had firm homes and many of us are testimony to that. My own grandfather (RIP) once told me of how they went on “guterura”(hijacking) missions and how they successfully accomplished them. This time around, women are vowing for the heads of the perpetrators of the so called practice. That, we should marry out of love? What is Loveafter all? As I was saying, we went to Umutara and of course, we had plenty of “birds” in our company! Not that I do not appreciate the work of nature but, when these “creatures” try to force us to fall in “love” with them, then that is blackmail! First and foremost, the members of the opposite sex normally say that “men’s brains are somewhere below their stomachs”, I beg to disagree with them. Where are theirs? Let me pray that, my “chain keeper” does not read this trash, lest she slams an “embargo” on me for a whole month, eh! Now, it is increasingly becoming a race for supremacy, be it girls or old women, they are all trying to outcompete each other, I don’t know for what! If I can imagine what my old auntie Kezia deep in Kabagore village would have said if she was at that party, most likely she would have rebuked most of the women folk there. As if they had all planned an assault on us, most ladies came with their “milk makers” literary hanging out. As if they were the ones that make all the milk that comes from Umutara! I know, many women believe that, men are like babies, that they need to be taken care of and that, without women, men would be lost! Ok, who told them that we need to be “breastfed”, or else why would they carry their “milk devices” popping out like that? Blessed are the Villagers,they could not dare carry themselves like this! The other day, while at Centenary House in the heart of Kigali, amazed, a lady seemingly in her fifties came to an office I was visiting, she was wearing her boobs in such a provocative manner that, only the strong hearted (those with brains far above their stomachs) could dare face her eyes to eyes. Mfashumwana@fastmail.fm