THE HATER : I hate people who…

…watch football in an animate way. These guys should actually just be called animals in need of further mental evolution. Picture a scenario where a grown man is sitting in his house watching a football game on TV. Then suddenly this joke of a man jumps high in the air and screams, “Come on Drogba scoreeeee!!!” As he screams his head off, he kicks the small table in front of him like it is a football. Hey fat boy, a game of football in Angola just simply cannot be influenced by your irrational shouts from Nyamirambo. Drogba cannot hear you even if you are wearing a fake Chelsea shirt. I have a simple message for you; Shut up! …use meaningless phrases in the English language. The Hater is not here to tell you about the correct English to use. I just don’t understand why people use phrases that make absolutely no sense. I hate guys who say, “The difference is the same.” It just can’t be a difference and still be the same. Where the hell do some of you learn this disgusting English? Queen Elizabeth II would consider abdicating her throne if she heard you utter such rubbish. As members of the Commonwealth, let us try to speak some good English. That way I can stop hating and retire early to an island in the Caribbean. …still drive very old and disgusting cars. Does it make sense to say Happy New Year to a guy driving a 1994 model of a Japanese second hand car? On Tuesday I sat in this very old taxi. The seats were so hard that I though I was actually on a church bench. I have failed to find the words to describe the state of the old seat belt. Each time the driver engaged a gear, you would think someone was belching. Reeaching my destination was indeed the first miracle of 2010. I still don’t know how passengers and the owners survive contracting tetanus in this piece of scrap. We need a tough law on these old vehicles that go to Kicukiro, Kanombe, Masaka, Nyacyonga, and Byumba. …always want to bargain before buying anything. Now that the credit crunch is history, it n longer makes sense for you to use it as an excuse for your financial bad manners. That is why I really hate people who chronically bargain each time they have to pay for something. I know it works out well sometimes. I just don’t get it when you do it all the time. Some guys even bargain on goods that carry a clear price tag. Fellows if you see the price written on the good do not bargain. Just pay or leave it. That is how supermarkets operate. Look, pick, decide and then pay. It is that simple. …think that new necessarily means better. By now it ought to be quite clear to any right thinking person that not all new things are better than the old ones before them. I know for a fact that I am smarter than most people younger than me. I also know that most new (Chinese) products can barely last a week. More so, a Land Rover made in the 80’s will surely last longer than the latest version of a BMW. I therefore felt like beating up some joker who kept insisting that new music is better than old music. By exposing his musical puberty, he gave me something more to hate. Let me help you hate by sending your suggestions to thehater2009@gmail.com