HUMOUR : “Caught in Own Trap”

Sometimes I get amazed by the way; we Africans (blacks) look down upon our own! Maybe we are trying to emulate the Biblical saying where it is said that, “a prophet is never honoured in his own land”. How else does one explain the recent xenophobic trends in South Africa, Kenya, and Congo etc? Are we really an inferior race? I suppose not. There are some “poisonous mushrooms” (if I may borrow one leader’s saying) out there, trying to poison our way of thinking. This is not to say that, all “poison” emanates from outside our continent, not quite, the biggest element is within our own mindset. How does one explain our tendency to downplay our own race and colour to the extent of bleaching the colour of our skins, “cook” our hair, so that we look like “zungus”? This is as if to say that, we are an inferior breed trying to attain a status quo through hook and crook! I am not a supporter of any of the above mentioned forms of evil as well as belittling oneself! Some of us are made up of really “hard” materials; we do not easily quake, not under any circumstances. It is with this that I always call a spade a spade and not a big spoon. That said, I sometimes tone down my language so that many may not get “scandalised”. Against the East African background, there is a lot of fear that country X or Y or Z will soon dominate country A or B or C; I do not subscribe to that line of thought. If you work diligently and exercise the necessary expertise, sooner than later, you would “outrun” those so called expatriates, it is just a matter of time “T”. This is a real story that took place in one of the East African states. A muzungu hailing from of the European donor nations found himself “employed” as a “volunteer” in charge of a “Coffee Rehabilitation Scheme”. First of all, he was being paid a cool United States Dollars three thousand as cost of living allowance (volunteers never earn a salary because they work for nothing). Of course, someone travelling all those thousands of miles to come and help you deserves the few thousands of dollars to make their voluntary services be performed better, how do you expect the person to walk on foot or sleep uncomfortably? Now, this guy called Koffi (not his real name) set off from the comfort of his hotel room to go and embark on a site visit. Since he was “fresh” from abroad, he was accorded the services of a chauffeur (driver) to take him around. As they were busy moving upcountry, Koffi could not contain his curiosity, “What is that forest?” he asked the driver. “That is your friend, Coffee”, the driver answered. Koffi was caught in his own trap, how was he going to advise others on a subject he himself did not know? It was like an impotent man advising others on how to make their wives pregnant. Most times, people judge someone by the colour of their skin, that is like judging the book by its cover! Mfashumwana@fastmail.fm