GET INSPIRED:Anger management: control rage before it controls you

Have you realized why you ended up in that heated argument that you paid for so dearly? Ever had everlasting resentment towards someone or something? Or it was a fateful relationship whose bitterness still haunts? It’s high time you overcame anger. Fury is one wicked way to confront issues and it never gives a perfect solution. Instead of writing whoever angers you in that black book and promise revenge, better rid yourself of that venom before it consumes your heart. Charles Spielberger, a psychologist defines anger as an emotional state that varies in intensity from mild irritation to tense fury and rage. Like any other emotions anger is accompanied by physiological and biological changes. According to the psychologist when one gets angry, their heart rate and blood pressure go up, the levels of one’s energy hormones goes up too. This explains why people opt for different options when they get angry.As some fight others argue while some cry or even take a solution to revenge. “When angry, I throw whatever I lay my hands on at the person who has offended me,” says Clairryce Ineza. Many people are no longer themselves when they get offended. All they think of is getting even. For families, anger is the cause of hatred or favouritism. “My mother always thinks she is in the right when she gets angry, she furiously utters words to us that she later regrets them and seeks forgiveness,” says Noel Rwitare. Anger at some point has brought us irreversible regrets. If we were to interview serial killers about their cause, most of them were pissed off by a certain gender, race or age group and they decided to kill whoever relates to it! Yes, most serial killers kill only women or men or people between this and that age. We have lost people we cherished in life just to remember when it’s too late yet we can’t turn back the hand of time. Though anger is natural, we can take measures about it. Even the hot tempered person can manage their anger. For starters, define what really pisses you off. Is it a person, a relationship or personal issues that you can never change? The moment you identify these, try your best to avoid them, as for the causes you can never change learn living with them.Thinking positive is a magic way to fight anger. “Create an imaginary world for yourself one far away from all that is bothering you, Phillipa Umutoni says. This erased the horrible memories of her abusive ex-husband. With a person, always think of the few good things they’ve done to colour your life. You’ll end up feeling more sympathy for them than hatred.Never take action when you are angry. Since anger emotionally hurts, people take quick decisions before thinking. For instance resigning at work or uttering abusive words. It’s logical that all angry people want to be heard out but there are better ways to do so. Conflict and arguments will make things even worse. Incase you have a bad temper, try breathing in heavily. Do this before responding to the offender. You can also say soothing words like ‘relax, its fine’ to yourself. This will communicate to your mind and in no time you’ll feel better. Getting rid of anger isn’t a simple task but it’s worth it. Let’s not let anger rule over us. Ends