Being a woman is proving to be a task. I am a feminist but this time I have failed to understand my fellow species. I know by the time my sisters finish reading this article, I will be advised to have a sex swap. Being a woman is a negative, all other things being equal, but all other things are never equal. Well I always wonder how it would be like if there were three species in the world, men, women, and specimen X. I would have done all I could to be specimen X but now am stuck. Recently I went for an interview in one of the major banks in Rwanda. The secretary who most likely had chewed some raw garlic in the morning still had the bitter taste in her mouth. I want to believe that is why she had a natural sneer on her mouth. My colleague and I had an appointment with the C.E.O. and in such a rude manner she told us to get a place we could sit as we waited. My colleague turned to me and asked how it felt to be a woman, all those mood swings, attitude, uncalled for arrogance, bla bla…… This got me thinking, may be this lady had spent a sleepless night breast feeding a colic baby next to a drunk snoring man. Maybe she had just realised that she was pregnant and had to face the 9 months with this man who doesn’t care at all or may it was just my screaming red top and the unofficial look that offended her. That really disoriented me to a point I didn’t ask all the questions I had prepared. My colleague helped me out though he said that I took it too far and that he has seen the stupid element also in me. But really why are women against each other? The other day my friend told me that she went home late and forgot to replace the finished salt in her house. She knocked at her landlady who is also her neighbour. The land lady banged the door back at her and said even them coincidentally are eating food with no salt. “How can I afford to pay six months rent upfront and Rwf50,000 worth of cash power and be denied salt only because I was in my pajamas?” she complained. It gets so boring sometimes to think that men are just so lucky that they never have these mood swings, they don’t have to be indoors to pee, they don’t know the price we pay every month, they can never even imagine how it feels to give birth yet a child is always referred as the man’s daughter or son. Just five minutes of pleasure and “bang!” some man is someone’s father. Isn’t that life fun? As if that is not enough, when women are busy aging with menopause, men are busy revitalizing their energy and muscles. It hurts to think about the very Bible that I believe in does not mention women in the genealogies. It leaves me wondering, is that why God is a “HE”? I am not really regretting why I am a woman but sometimes I wish I could live my first part of my life as a woman then my old age as a man. In almost all African culture, its only bad when a woman talks loudly in public, its only awkward when it’s a woman taking hard drinks, it’s only too bad when it’s a woman paying the bills. Women are the ones referred to as prostitutes yet it takes two to complete the act. They say that men are physically stronger. A man can carry and lift heavier weights. Any problem that requires physical strength to resolve, a man can do it better. A Woman is emotionally stronger. A Woman is not afraid to express and verbalise emotions, not afraid to cry. Any problem that requires emotional openness and awareness to resolve, a woman can do it better. But honestly, what is this that a man can do that a woman can’t do? After a very good research, I came up with an answer which can not be published but can answer through my email. Contact: karuthum@gmail.com
