At a women’s event last week I had the pleasure of interacting with young hardworking and passionate women who are using their gifts and talents to change their livelihoods and contribute to changing their communities at large. One thing that was echoed by many participants and speakers, though, was that there are immense opportunities for women but unfortunately women do not go for them. In spite of many females holding influential positions and making policies, men have continued to be bolder than their female counterparts. It is so bad that even when a job is calling for female applicants only, men will give it a shot. Culture has been blamed for women’s laid back nature and less aggressiveness but that made sense years ago, today what ‘backward’ aspect of the wider culture do we respect or adhere to? Parents are educating their daughters, multinationals are hiring female CEOs, governments are uplifting women, women are building houses and raising families, is it right to continue blaming culture? At what point will we appreciate the efforts around us and blame ourselves for not advancing? In every field one can think of today, there will be a female to inspire other women. Several examples were voiced at this event, including one from Joel of Imbuto Foundation who decried the small number of women that apply for iaccelerator; a whole $10000 to be won by innovators and we have countable women, yet the innovation being invited for funding this time should respond to issues of teenage pregnancy. Why do majority of our gender lag behind? Someone has blamed women in positions for influence and power for not taking fellow women by the hand. That as soon as a woman is successful they go for male friends. That cannot be absolutely right. Of all the things that could propel someone to the next level in their life, personal effort tops the list. One must dream their dream. Once that phase is done it is up to an individual to envision that and see how to bring the dream to life. One would wish for everyone else to stop what they are doing and lead them to their dream but that will not happen because each of us is dreaming and doing what we can to actualise those very personal dreams. The friends that talk to us about success, or those that offer to mentor us, will only be assisted by our attitudes. If an adult has decided they are okay wherever they are, it becomes difficult to get them out. We constantly talk of attitude change; it is all talk until an individual decides to view themselves and their circumstances differently. Not to limit ourselves to financial freedom and success, attitude change and personal effort and desire could take us out of an addiction or an environment that is not conducive. It could take us from any situation. As human beings we are fond of looking for who or what to blame but that does not help. Real help does come from within us.