Relationships: Why his bank account is kept secret

To some people, money is highly regarded as one of the key determinants of how a marriage or relationship plays out. Some prefer to openly engage their spouses on the levels of their earnings in a bid to smoothen things out in the name of transparency. Others keep their earnings under a shroud of mystery. Hence it becomes quite tricky for some men to openly reveal how much they earn to their spouses. Delphine Mukamusoni is married with four children. She says sometimes, in some cases men don’t come out as sincere in revealing how much they are worth. ‘Many men are not sincere and there is a tendency of under declaring their earnings in order to reduce pressure from family members’, says Mukamusoni. Mukamusoni says when a man hides his earnings this sets a bad precedent and this may lead to mistrust among the couple, something that can lead to divorce. ‘I only got to know that my husband had a secret bank account the day when he died’, adds Mukamusoni. According to her story, she learnt about the sad news when her husband’s relatives were considering giving her a percentage of this money because she had kids to take care of.’ ‘ I had mixed feelings of whether to be mad at my late husband or not but I later confirmed on how to adequately respond to this situation from other women who had encountered a similar case and I barked off’, reveals Mukamusoni. We have all heard of those cases where women have taken a step to report their husbands to the courts of law regarding irresponsibility yet they are financially well-off. But those who subscribe to this school of thought had their ‘own reasons’. One remarked that ‘extravagance is a characteristic of most women, a reason why men prefer to manage their accounts alone. Going to posh places is ideal to any woman with a working class spouse yet to a host of men, it’s the opposite’. Another supported this thinking by saying that ‘at times when I told my wife about how much I had earned out of a project, she would as well lineup her needs which were just endless’. It thus goes that, some men have remained private about money related issues. ‘I don’t do it in bad faith, but I think my woman shouldn’t know all about my businesses’, says Noel Nsekanabo. He says women are fragile and there are some issues they should not know. ‘What if she got to know that I was in a very big debt that could send me to jail’, says Nsekanabo. Some men contend that issues related to men’s finances are tricky. However those opposed to this thinking are quick to point out that the days of such ‘chauvinists’ are indeed numbered. Women have been ‘emancipated from the yoke of such vices’ and it is just a matter of time before these trends are done away with for good. Contact: lillianean@yahoo.com