Not too long ago, almost all the youth in East Africa wanted to be Diamond Platnumz. Our youth wanted to sing like Chibu, dress like him, be muscular and toned like him, and date a slay queen like him. But the youth in our region are fickle. Very fickle. So fickle that, as I type this, most of them no longer want anything to do with Chibu’s biceps and six pack and his ‘slay queen wifey.’ To these young and restless millenials, Diamond is no longer the G.O.A.T. The new G.O.A.T is Tekno Miles and indeed, he hails from thousands of miles away from Bongo land. I know some of you are already up wondering what Tekno and Diamond did to me to deserve to be called goats. Well, I picked that description from my young millennial friends who think they know everything and who always use strange and annoying lingo in order to cut the rest of society out of their naughty conversations. So just know, the next time a millennial calls you GOAT, that they hold you in such high regard; that, to them, you are the MVP –the greatest of all time. Going by what I witnessed at the Tekno Miles gig last weekend, this Nigerian invasion is real. In fact, I’m now convinced that in the not-so-distant future, it will take just the blink of an eye for you to miss the latest Nigerian artist performing in Kigali. In fact, as you read this, you are just a week away from the next Nigerian invasion. It’s Runtown baby, and as you read this, his manager is already in town as advance party. Speaking of Tekno’s GOAT status among Kigali’s Mark Zuckerberg generation, I don’t know if the same applies to his Kenyan fans as the news that wafted from Nairobi following Tekno’s performance there was not good at all. To my Kigali peeps that chose to take their girls to the Tekno concert, I hope you were man enough to know that just because she was screaming her voice hoarse and thrusting her nubile body towards the Pana singer does not mean you are a loser. Your girl’s only crime was that she is either a slay queen, or an aspiring slay queen and that is what slay queens do at social gatherings.
