Reflections on sunday: The next Waterloo for our French foes!

The French government and military officials have not only bitten off more than they can chew with the arrest of Mrs. Rose Kabuye, as Ngango Rukara said, but methinks they have bitten their tongue! And it won’t be the first time. I remember at the onset of the Rwanda Patriotic Front/Army (RPF/A) war against the génocidaire regime of late Habyarimana, when France rushed in to protect the pot-bellied punks of the then Rwanda government army. What happened haunts the French to-date. You see, the Habyarimana boys had tasted what they called cockroach firepower and lost the appetite for another fight. Not knowing what to do, Habyarimana called to his ‘papa’ in Europe, Francois Mitterrand, to come and chase away the invading foreign snakes for him. Mitterrand in turn called on his other ‘fils’ (son) on the African continent, Mobutu Sese Seko Wa Zabanga, etc., to go and check out the snakes attacking his younger brother next-door, meaning Habyarimana. Mobutu said not to worry ‘papa’, I’ll handle everything. Mobutu then fitted out his soldiers with sophisticated gear from ‘papa’, and let them loose with a cheerful “Happy hunting!” Commandant Mahele, in charge of the happy force, assured his Commander-in-Chief he was going to do a sweeping job that would make ‘Citoyen’ (citizen N0.1) extremely pleased. When he reached Kigali, Mahele assured Habyarimana the invading foreign cockroaches were soon going to be history. He said he was going to chase them ‘buguru budakora hasi’ (relentlessly) until he threw them across the border, if he didn’t kill them all. When he reached the frontline, he didn’t know what hit him! After licking his wounds, Mahele called back his surviving boys and they made a beeline for the shops of Kigali. There they looted and drunk and then headed for their border town of Goma. It is said that Commandant Mahele, wherever he was after that, was always heard muttering to himself: “Those are truly not humans. What kind of humans wouldn’t fear bullets? These ones, the more you shoot the more they advance. ‘Filons’ (Let’s run away)!” On hearing this, Mitterrand was hopping mad and he called Habyarimana to ask: “What’s wrong with your soldiers, why couldn’t they join the Congolese to chase away those foreigners? Haven’t I heard that Banyarwanda used to be the bravest warriors of that region?” That, it is said, is how Habyarimana was forced to swallow his lie. He said: “Listen, ‘papa’, those invaders are actually not foreign. They are Tutsis who are coming back to reclaim this whole Great Lakes region as their empire!” Mitterrand was madder than a wasp and he shouted in the telephone: “Tutsis! That arrogant, minority group of Rwanda! I am going to send you a crack, elite force that will not rest until they throw them into Kaguta Museveni’s very bedroom!” Indeed, within an hour French elite forces had arrived into Rwanda from countries like Chad, Niger and Cameroon. They immediately headed for the frontline and set up heavy artillery and started bombing RPA positions. For scaring, the heavy weapons were known locally as ‘Dimba hasi!’ (Stomp the ground!) After a round of shelling, French soldiers would send in the Rwanda government soldiers to go and mop up. To their puzzlement, however, every time a group went, it would not come back. The French realised they were in danger when shells started falling amongst their ranks. Before they could organise themselves, RPA fighters were among them! The French abandoned their artillery and took to their heels, but then the RPA fighters started shelling their fleeing backs with the same French weapons! A good number of them were felled. The next encounters with RPA fighters were even more disastrous, thus the unbending hatred. When they helped, and even joined, the génocidaires to kill more than a million innocent Rwandans, French government and military officials were trying to reclaim their pound of flesh. They’ll continue to attempt revenge but Rwandans should not worry. The French will always meet a sticky end. Bravo, Mrs. Rose Kabuye, for showing them how! Contact: ngina2@yahoo.co.uk