Villager: What a weekend

My weekend began way back on Saturday evening, my chain keeper went to visit her friend; her long lost friend that she could not easily remember when they last met in the recent memory. That was fine with me; I could go out with my friends. Yes, when she goes, the ‘chain’ goes with her and who wouldn’t want some freedom? As never before, I headed straight for the famous Car Wash, a.k.a Throat Wash. I just wanted something that would really quench my thirst but not kill me quick. We settled for some Amstels. My goodness, the stuff tasted even better than before! Maybe it’s because I had been under house arrest for too long. You know, when a dog is released from a leash, its instinctive reaction is to run fast as it can away from the chain. As the MoCK (members of the chain keepers) like to tell their men, we really are like dogs! Anyway, I hit the place at an hour or so after darkness and as the cocks were about to crow, I was still at the same spot, oblivious of the rush of time. An hour or two past midnight, I decided that enough was enough and decided to hit the road for home but then, one of the guys we were with wanted to be dropped off at KBC. On the way to KBC, we encountered a team of Blue Boys to test how much alcohol one had consumed. Sincerely, those gadgets are not accurate, they were made for the Wazungu by Wazungu, and they more than often indicate that we Africans have very little blood in our alcohol! The guy told me that “Urasomyeho” (you have sipped a bit), is that a crime anyway? The next thing was them calling a one Hadji, a.k.a Abdul Karemera, to drive me to the traffic head office. I went to pay and I was told to pay a cool Frw30,000 on top of the genuine Frw50,000. The Frw30,000 is paid at the traffic police base, in a red container to a small boy dressed in civilian attire a.k.a Hadji’s son. A warning to all those that “somaho” and drive, make sure that you have no valuable in your car as, when the Blue Boys and their friend Hadji, take control of car, they will ransack it. I a number of Audio CDs that were stolen and when I tried to raise the issue, the policemen simply brushed me aside that I was drunk and could not remember what I had and did not have in my own car. Is it a case of those who are meant to protect us conniving with thieves to fleece us? Contact: Mfashumwana@fastmail.fm