I am married but also sexually attracted to other women, especially ones much older than I am. The lady I am attracted to this time is quite cute, smart and to be honest has an incredible body.

Every time we meet, I bring up a conversation and even though she acts like she is just a friend, I really always try to push things to move to the next level.

However, I also love my wife.  What should I do?  I fantasise about this woman all the time and I don’t want to ruin my family.

Eric, 31 

It will pass

Fantasising about another woman older or younger than you is pretty normal, if most of us can be honest, we do it all the time.

You have a wife whom you claim to love and a family, so before going further asking an older lady out, be sure that she is worth leaving your wife and children. Be sure that when you are in your 4o’s and she is well into her 50’s, you will still be attracted to her and regard her as highly as you do now. If you cannot be sure that you will still have the same feelings for her, just keep your amusement to yourself. Before you ‘take things to the next level’ think if you will still have the same feelings for her at a later date when she is older.

What you have is just a fascination that will come to pass after a while and you will move on and be fascinated by another prettier one.   You can still have the same feelings for your wife, look at her every day the same way you viewed her when you first met her, I am sure you will find whatever you think is lost.

Collins, 26, is married

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Find fun things to do with your wife

You need some serious advice! Now I assume you have ever heard people saying "Keep it in your pants”. Many men do get sexually attracted to other women but so what? Are you going to sleep with all of them?

You have a wife that you made vows to. That new lady isn’t the last you will see and won’t be the last that will make you feel like this. So, will you always go for them? You have to be serious with your wife and live up to the vows you made on your wedding day. 

If you say you still love your wife and you want to keep the marriage going, it’s time to stop fantasising about other women. It will end very badly for you if you do not cut it out now!

Find something that will strengthen the bond between you and your wife; look for more exciting things to do together.  Your urge to stray will water down eventually and soon, you’ll be solely focused on your wife.

Patrick, 22, is in stable relationship

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Why did you get married?

It’s obvious that you are one of those guys who don;t take their wedding vows seriously. I have to  ask, why did you get married?

Was it out of obligation? Were you forced by your parents or did you simply hate the idea of walking around without a ring even though you have no idea why you are wearing it? Marriage is not a joke. It is quite disturbing that you want advice on what to do about saving your marriage.  

I think your family deserves better. You are a colossal waste of perfectly good space. Even those older women should know better than date a scoundrel like you.Grow up! If you truly still love your wife, you will go back to her and be the man she needs you to be.

I’m sure if yougive it your undivided time, it will actually turn out to be great. Dont throw away something good fro something you are not even sure of.

Martin, 29, is single