Fat-shaming and why we really need to stop it

In the blog sphere lately, there have been a lot of articles discussing the topic of fat-shaming and body-shaming in general.

Wednesday, October 02, 2013

In the blog sphere lately, there have been a lot of articles discussing the topic of fat-shaming and body-shaming in general.

Body-shaming in short is when a person makes you feel bad about your body but without directly insulting you. For example, in fat-shaming, a person may make a small comment about the content on your plate and how maybe you shouldn’t be eating all those fries and maybe choose a salad. Or how someone at work may suggest you start going to their gym with them implying that you should start working out.

Body-shaming is used on people who are skinny, tall, short, with an afro or relaxed hair, who choose to not wear make up or those who do; in short, it happens to anyone but mostly to women.

When a person fat-shames another, they really think they are helping them by encouraging them to lose weight. I’ve shared my experiences on fat-shaming in this column numerous times but I have never titled it fat-shaming because honestly, I think I was in denial.

I didn’t want to make these people bullies and just continue to see them as ignorant. However, that is because I have pretty good self-esteem, if I didn’t, I’m pretty sure all these comments would have thrown me into a darker side of things, which happens to many young people and women.

I have seen young boys and girls fat-shamed by their own parents and relatives and it continues at school too. Some believe they have the right to comment on other people’s bodies. In what world is a male colleague’s comment towards my body okay?

Like we are here to work and you find it acceptable to tell me that even though I have nice chubby legs, gaining weight is not good and that I should stop. People this really happened, I wish I could make it up and I wish I could say I leaped across my desk and strangled him but in real life, I just looked at him and ignored him. 

I think he thought he would be the sole catalyst to push me into the right direction and that his observation will be the reason I lose some weight.  

In our society, people will comment on anything and everything. Seriously, a woman will look at you at the salon and make a comment about the texture of your hair as if hers is better. Skinny-shaming is very real too.

Many people feel the need to encourage a skinny person to eat more because the way they look is not healthy. My issue with fat-shaming is that in many cases you will find the victim may actually be healthier than the person making the comment.

For example, in my situation, I do eat healthy most of the time, so if you see me reaching for an extra helping of desert please do not feel the need to comment. It is simply because I feel I can afford to have that extra helping. Let’s all be a little bit more courteous with our comments because you never know how the receiver may take it.

Have any of you ladies ever experienced fat-shaming?