Can we stop wasting time and get married already?

So, we all know how Beyonce’s Single Ladies song goes – I once caught a male friend singing it in the shower and if I hadn’t been a witness to the way his eyes glow every time he sees a woman, I would’ve sworn he was gay! But that’s beside the point – this is about my sisters who feel they are wasting a lot of time courting rather than making things official by tying the knot and starting a family of their own. 

Wednesday, August 28, 2013

So, we all know how Beyonce’s Single Ladies song goes – I once caught a male friend singing it in the shower and if I hadn’t been a witness to the way his eyes glow every time he sees a woman, I would’ve sworn he was gay! But that’s beside the point – this is about my sisters who feel they are wasting a lot of time courting rather than making things official by tying the knot and starting a family of their own. 

I’m certain I have expressed my disgust in my biology clock ticking way faster than necessary.  Anyway, one afternoon, as I ranted on about the speed in which the year has ended, a friend pointed out that while 40 seems like a lifetime time away, it won’t be funny when it comes and she still has no kids to her name.

By the end of the conversation, she had made it clear that should 35 come and she still has no DNA trotting around, she will go to a sperm bank herself. She blamed a lot of the ‘not married yet I’m supposed to be’ part on men who made it their life’s mission to waste her time! She talked about the six year relationship that damn near got her picking out wedding china only for things to hit the fan and never recover, something she curses till this day.

Like my friend here, most women have found themselves in what they think are promising relationships. These "promising relationships” however turn into what I can only brand a massive waste of time. I say waste of time because for starters, to the ones dedicated to ‘forever’, that is exactly what it becomes. I’ve met one too many chicks who were bitter about past relationships that lasted a long time but never actually went anywhere – and by not going anywhere they mean they didn’t result into marriage.

So, what does a sister have to do to be taken seriously? A male colleague insists that women today are blinded by their desire to get married. He says that instead of focusing on the great relationship they are in, they are too busy trying to get the man to marry them. And that spoils everything. "And then after that they claim a guy wasted their time,” he said in a tone that sounded more like a hiss!

This very guy dated a chick for over eight years, everything was going perfectly until either her parents or nosey friends convinced her that the only thing missing in her life was a signed document and a ring on her finger.

The guy felt things were okay as they were and saw no need to prove their love with some document. The girl disagreed and claimed she was not about to have children out of wedlock as she wanted to follow in her mother’s footsteps and do things the right way. So they parted ways. Who wasted who’s time? That is a debate still going on today.

We all want different things in life. And if we can’t get them, we are forced to compromise. So, just how far are you willing to go to get what you want?