I have some friends who are studying ACCA. This is the time of the year when they sit for ACCA exams. They also sit for these exams in December of each year. From what I have heard, those exams are incredibly difficult.

I am told that people enter the exam room smiling only to leave after 3 hours in a miserable state. But I have been telling these friends that there are even tougher exams out there! I narrated to them how I attended SFB for a mature degree course several years ago. My first exam was an eye opener for me!

So, when I was at SFB, I had set myself a real vision which included things like dining and wining at cocktail parties with big shots from the Government and international circles. I told myself that after graduating from SFB, I would be punctuating my conversation with such words as; inflation rates, interest rates, exchange rates plus any other different rates. With such words emanating from my mouth, I guess that my curriculum vitae would be expanding in size and in content.

But in order to achieve that vision mine, I had to first overcome some hurdles. The first hurdle that I was faced with was the dreaded class test. Our lecturers had informed us that class tests would contribute towards our final score. Therefore, as students at SFB, we had to sit for these tests in order to assure ourselves a promotion to the champion’s league.

However, I quickly realized that it was the tough guys who finally make it to the champion’s league of SFB. This realization came to pass when I boldly entered the exam room with my pocket full of items. These items ranged from pencils, pens, rulers, rubbers and a pocket size bible. I do not usually go for Sunday church service due to the hangover from the previous nights. But when I am in a dire need for something, I remember my pocket bible. I put it near me so that when things become elephant for me, I can consult the holy verses for guidance.

So, when I settled in the exam room for my first SFB test, I knew that the paper would be crushed with no mercy. That is why I stretched my hands outwards in a bid to intimidate fellows around me. I figured out that my colleagues in class would attempt to copy my answers and therefore I had to employ all strategies of keeping them at bay. Besides, no one was contributing for my school fees and so they had no right whatsoever of borrowing a leaf from my old wisdom.

When the tests were handed out to all of us, the invigilator rang the bell and asked us to kick off. I opened the test paper to read through the questions. What I saw almost made me go blind. All ten questions were written in easy and user friendly English. But my eyes simply refused to read the questions in the Queen’s English. Instead my eyes told me that the questions had been set in the Arabic language.

That is why I put up my hand to ask; "Why have you given us a test in the Arabic language?” At this point all other students looked at me in bewilderment. They then let out a thunderous laughter before embarking on the test. As they wrote out their answers on page after page, I was busy trying hard to understand the questions set before me. By the end of the third hour, my answer sheet was blank. I just managed to inscribe my names and reference number before fleeing the exam room as a total failure.

So, my ACCA candidates should not feel like they are the only victims. Yours truly has been through the same fire!