Watch out for those red flags

The end of a dysfunctional relationship cannot be blamed on one individual. It takes two to tango and it certainly takes two to disentangle. It is quite common that when people are madly in love they do not care or even want to take heed of some of the things that can possibly lead to calamity. If you notice something about your partner that does that does not sit well with you, do not ignore it. It could later drive you apart. 

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

The end of a dysfunctional relationship cannot be blamed on one individual. It takes two to tango and it certainly takes two to disentangle. It is quite common that when people are madly in love they do not care or even want to take heed of some of the things that can possibly lead to calamity. If you notice something about your partner that does that does not sit well with you, do not ignore it. It could later drive you apart. 

Relationships are not easy, therefore, not everything that irritates you has the potential to be disastrous if properly handled. If a particular issue has been handled many times and each time leads to yelling, that is a huge red flag because it means that neither of you is willing to compromise. 

Selfishness: If your partner is the kind of person that sits and waits for gifts to stream in from you without ever considering to do the same, be careful. People who simply want to be on the receiving end of everything are undeniably selfish.   Gifts in this regard could be tangible gifts, acts of service, quality time - anything to show affection or appreciation. Everyone is capable of giving and it does not need to have a monetary value attached to it. 

Indecisiveness: If your partner is the kind that will not make a decision without consulting a third party like a parent, sibling or friend when there is really no need to then don’t just sit back. If you decide on something and your partner changes their mind for no reason whatsoever, the red flag is waving and you need to start evaluating whether you can live with someone who interferes with decisions that you ought to make as a couple. 

Obsession: If your partner is strangely attached to you like their world revolves around you, be ready for more. Soon, going off to spend time with relatives or even work retreats will become a problem because they don’t want to stay away from you for too long. This behaviour sometimes leads to insecurity and other psychological problems. 

Possessiveness: Everybody longs for attention from the one they love. Even men, though they do not openly show it. It is nice to frequently check on those you love but when texts are constantly about your whereabouts, who you are with and what you are doing, start raising an eyebrow. If your phone soon becomes their new obsession, and they insist on having the password to your social media accounts, two words - Red Flag!