Once, I had the sexiest conversation of my life with a fellow whose name I didn’t even care to memorize! He was so cute that I was more concerned about the direction of our conversation than his name. 

Considering the fact that I had only taken a few beers, I could still hold a decent conversation. As a matter of fact, my talk had never been ‘steadier’!  I laughed when I was supposed to (killing the rumour that Rwandan chicks are slow and don’t ‘clic’k jokes), flipped the weave on my head every time a strand of hair covered my eye (trying to look as natural as possible), and even asked for a glass for my beer (as opposed to drinking directly from the jug sized beer bottle before me).

I’d like to think I looked really hot that day or that my intelligence had gone up a notch because the man was fascinated by me. I even slowed down on the beers – lest my intellectual speech deserted me. Some would say I was being too forward, but then again, so was he and the last time I checked, we were both adults. I know some women choose not to express their interest in a man until they are sure about his intentions (whatever that means) and I think it’s cute. But when a man walks up to you, looking like Blair Underwood and bulging in all the right places, let’s just say my intentions are far from pure! 

Not that I was out to score a man – because that is the message flirting usually sends off but once in a while, it’s nice to have a man walk up to you and make you feel like ‘the only girl in the world’.  Every woman has a sexy flirt inside of her capable of getting a man’s attention. We may not all carry the same self confidence or ‘know-how’ required for this flirtatious side but if scoring a man is what you are after, then honey, you NEED that flirt. You cannot score a date unless you give him the green light- a sign that expresses that you are interested in him. 

After all, women are not the only ones struggling with doubts and insecurities. Men also feel insecure or unsure on how to put themselves out there. They are afraid of reading a woman wrong, they fear rejection and are intimidated by women they find very attractive. So, if a guy you find attractive bravely walks up to you to get the communication started, help the boy out a little! By helping him out, you will help yourself out too- because you like him and want to talk to him.

You don’t have to walk up to him yourself or throw yourself at him – God no (unless you have balls the size of China). But if he constantly stares at you (and not in a creepy way) then smile a little. If he smiles back – bam…that’s your in. The ball is now in his court. Let the flirting begin.