Okay, that is pretty harsh but it is a harsh reality we all have to face at some point in life. I know that the topic of change is one that I have written about before but it is simply a constant cloud over me and I feel like many women also face the same issue.

If you peruse any of the blogs or websites that target women you come to realize that they are always talking about changes in terms of our bodies, our careers, our diets, the men we date, our financial situations, our hairstyles or the clothes we choose to put on our body. Either way it is always about change.

The challenge comes along when you try with all your might not to change but the circumstances in your life force you to. I am one of those people who swore across the board that no job or career would change me and the latest addition on my CV has changed me so drastically that I barely recognized myself from who I was a year ago.

To the older people in my life, these changes are great. They love this new person I have become and think I’m such a model citizen. They want to send all their little young children to me for a little of this change ‘gold dust’ to rub off on them.

While I love the fact that people see me as a responsible human being I sometimes I just want to go all ‘Rihanna’ on them and give the middle finger and run off into the sunset and never look back because the pressures in life weigh heavy. I have chosen to be this person and the responsibilities that come with it are tiring.

I always knew I would be good at something and be the person people want to be around. But instead of that many of my friends don’t really want to be around me because all I seem to do is talk about is work or work-related issues, which can be somewhat depressing. To be honest, I have a hard time hanging out with my old friends because I just don’t find them as challenging as I find my professional life. I feel like sitting and talking for hours is a waste of time these days and I should always be productive. 

I’m way too young to be feeling this way but I do.

I promise I will try not to write about this topic again, I just felt I had to put these thoughts on paper, after a meal I had with friends a while back (and I use the term ‘friend’ loosely because its tough to know who they are sometimes). I do not think I have ever felt so uncomfortable. I feel like have been removed from ‘normal’ society and now function in a small circle. This makes it hard for me to turn it off and on and remember how it is to be a young adult and just be myself.

Are any of you going through a major change in your life and don’t really feel like people around you get it?

Email me at 21stcenturywoman@newtimes.co.rw