So I got into a conversation with my boyfriend about our past partners. Women and men always talk about how this doesn’t matter and in our case it doesn’t matter or at least what he said but he also said if I did want to tell him I could. Should I take his word for it and believe he doesn’t care or should I just tell him how many people I have been with?

Jessica-----------------------------------------------

Dear Jessica,The question of whether one should reveal their past sexual escapades is one that I’ve heard before. I never think it is a good idea. It always causes some friction. Either your number is too high and you are a ‘slut.’ Or the number is too small and you are sexually ‘naïve’. And each person has a figure that they call ‘too high’ or ‘too low’. It is all subjective. I believe that what is past is past and instead of digging up old ghosts, its better to embrace the present and the future. About your boyfriend ‘offering’ you the opportunity to tell him ‘all’, I believe that he’s simply being a gentleman. Don’t tell him because, at the end of the day, he really doesn’t want to know.If you have a query, email itsaguything@newtimes.co.rw