Yesterday, when my father told me to keep quiet and let things be, I do not remember a time I have ever been more furious. I was furious because the person I was supposed to chastise was seated right there, smiling like the Cheshire cat, ready to partake of my father’s sweat
Yesterday, when my father told me to keep quiet and let things be, I do not remember a time I have ever been more furious. I was furious because the person I was supposed to chastise was seated right there, smiling like the Cheshire cat, ready to partake of my father’s sweatlike he had a right. Even now, I think of it, and my ears literally smoke!In this time and day, who still arranges marriages? Someone tell me. Well, it turns out that my relatives that day had rallied and decided that they needed to send an emissary to urge my father to accept that I am old enough to get a husband. Trust me, I have read my share ofAmelia Earhart, Margaret Thatcher and all of those blessed femaleemancipation figures’ literature. My father can testify to the fact that I do not take kindly to being told what to do.That is why I do not really work with my relatives. No offence aunties, but in another life I was a tomboy. And we are notorious for being rebels. Anyways, I talked to a few of my friends and it turns out that, that is also another of those outdated norms that are still being practiced inRwanda. Marriages are still being practically arranged for the girls here.Why would you deny me a life with someone I love because you want me to develop the family? Is the entire clan going to live with me in the marital hell I am being forced into? No wonder men here cheat like they were born to do it; you get a man dissatisfied with the wife, the wife barely cognizant that she is a married woman and voila, the family’s death rites are prounced. Zoe officially introduced Ivan to the family last night. She was very nervous, but Iassured her that Dad is a very liberal thinker and as long as she loves Ivan, he will accept it. I was right. Dad is an open-minded pastor. He promotes love, and to refuse his daughter her love, would be going against his sermons.However, Uncle Colombe had visited, and of course he was a member of the panel that selects who our future mates are. As in a board where a member has outlived his usefulness, he was incensed that he had not chosen Ivan. So he finally came up with a verdict; there was no way Ivan could ever date Zoe.This is what got my goat. He said that however, if the boy is willing to give the family a cow, (Fresian at that) he was free to marry Zoe. But who said anything about marriage? She was introducing her boyfriend to her father in respect and not necessity. If anyone has a family like mine, join me in the fight against arranged marriages!