The Bachelor: Too much effort?

So, now that you know how fate has conspired to keep me single for eternity, I don’t blame you for feeling like you are superior to me. I mean, to you, it all must seem so easy to get a girlfriend, or even two girls, or even have girls  lining up for you.

Saturday, July 07, 2012
George Clooney has dated many women but remains a long time bachelor. Net Photo.

So, now that you know how fate has conspired to keep me single for eternity, I don’t blame you for feeling like you are superior to me. I mean, to you, it all must seem so easy to get a girlfriend, or even two girls, or even have girls  lining up for you. And you do it all so effortlessly, without so much bother. Maybe even if you didn’t ask out any girl, u would still get a girl somehow. Well, maybe I fail because I put in too much effort, like someone once advised me. That could be possible. Look at this one time when I was still at school. I got to know this girl at a school party thrown for the senior class, and these girls came in from a girls’ school, and for that day, we all pretended to be gentlemen, treating our ladies to fine food, music and dance. And it went well. While I was not able to secure a commitment from any of these one-hundred plus girls, to be my girlfriend, I got a few promising leads. This particular girl was kind and nice, and she replied to all my letters. We went for vacation, and I saw her a couple of times, and when we started university, the first thing I did was find out which hall or hostel she was staying in. She was in hostel, and I visited her, ofcourse, as soon as she was "settled in”. I would have wanted to visit her the very first day we started, but she said she was still settling in. It took her about two weeks to settle in, and eventually, I went over and visited her.  I was committed to winning this girl’s heart over, patiently, but steadily. From that day on, I visited her almost every single day, bringing her supper, and everything else I felt she needed. She never asked me for anything, but well, I felt like I had to bring her stuff. I mean, I had to look after my woman, right? Ok, she wasn’t yet my woman, but we were almost there. It’s just that everytime I tried to bring up that topic; she said we shall talk about it some other time. And I understood her. I was a patient man, I liked the girl, and I didn’t want to pressure her. I wanted her to get to know that I was a nice guy. But maybe girls don’t like nice guys. Because towards the end of the first semester, while I still waited for the answer to my question, I found out that she was seeing someone else. First reaction was total disappointment, then, came in clarity. I have been rejected so many times that I no longer seem to register the impact of rejection. This one pained me though, because I was almost, no, I was convinced that she had no other guy, and that I stood excellent chances. The guy turned out to be a former classmate of mine.  And he seemed genuinely honest when he said he didn’t know that I was interested in the girl. And he said they had been dating for over six months. Everyone else seemed to know about it but me. They had been dating since vacation, way before we started university. This girl had a boyfriend all along, and that explains why she never wanted to talk about me and her dating. I didn’t know how the guy had even got her because he never seemed interested in that girl at all. It’s like he just appeared out of the blue and asked her out and she accepted. I had never found him visiting her, or even calling her. So, how come he was able to get her, and keep her with such little effort, while I did everything, and never even managed to get a sensible date with her? I put in time, thought and money. I mean, I bought the girl a TV, and for that whole month, I nearly starved! Well, a few months later, one of the guys I lived with in my hostel told me that I that I try too hard, I put in too much effort. I tended to believe him because he was the most laid back guy, but within a single semester he had dated three girls. Well, we are made differently.