When I encountered a wolf in a sheep’s skin!

My days as a new employee in town have not stopped me from pursuing other important matters. These are matters that tend to make the old men of Mutara happy. They tend to smile when they receive news that one of their Kigali sons would be introducing a fiancée over the weekend.

Saturday, June 02, 2012

My days as a new employee in town have not stopped me from pursuing other important matters. These are matters that tend to make the old men of Mutara happy. They tend to smile when they receive news that one of their Kigali sons would be introducing a fiancée over the weekend.

Their smile comes about due to the fact that several liters of beers would be consumed at such functions. That is why I have continued to receive threatening warnings from up north. The bazeyis have been sending signals to the effect that I am overdue in terms of a bride search.   But I have still failed to find that one single lady who would be willing to consume cheaper booze such as the local beers! Almost all ladies that I have come across insist on expensive wines and Rums. They will always choose the most expensive joints and fearlessly place an order for wines such as; Fume Blanc, Inglenook, Montrose and Chateau de Leelanau. My only savior at such moments is that the waiters always come up with the right answer; "Madam, we do not sell such beers here”. Hurray! Good waiter indeed. I like a waiter who cannot differentiate wines from beers. When I come across a waiter who provides answers that save my pockets, I always leave behind a hefty tip of not less than 100 francs. Anyways, I usually end up enjoying my bottles of Amstel as the chick settles for a bottle of Fanta. But of recent, I was confronted by an incident that showed me how wolves hide themselves in sheep’s skin. Yes, I finally met a lady who professed to me that she was a cousin of an angel although she happened to be more than that. I took her out for dinner on two occasions and I was convinced that she was the right candidate. I was so convinced that I summoned Aggrey so that we could plan for an introduction ceremony. I advised Aggrey that my new fiancée was a saved girl and indeed she hailed from a very strict family. Therefore we would not tolerate any booze on the introduction day.   However, we had to plan for the other bazeyis who would travel all the way from Mutara. We had to budget for crates of beers which they would crush after the introduction ceremony was over.   Everything was set. I was now going to contact all relatives, friends and in-laws about this very important day. I also had to get out there to shop for "our” new life. I called my chick and invited her for a shopping spree. Could we go together to Nyabugogo market? No dear, I have to attend to my Auntie who is at King Faisal. Ah sorry! Since my fiancée could not go with me to Nyabugogo, I decided to go home and rest. Later that evening, Aggrey encouraged me to go with him to the new and most vibrant discotheque in town – K-club in Nyarutarama!  Wow! The place was buzzing with throngs of people. Music was booming from all corners. Patrons danced and guzzled like there was no tomorrow! I moved around enjoying the sounds and ambience of the club. As Aggrey joined his friends at the counter, I headed to another corner where I could feed my eyes to the maximum! As I started gulping one Amstel after another, I recognized a familiar voice right behind me. I turned around and was shocked at what I saw. There was my future bride having a swell time with a group of macho looking men. This is the person who had told me that she was attending to her ill Auntie at the King Faisal hospital! What was happening? I rubbed my eyes again. Phew, in her right hand was a cigarette. The left hand was clutching tightly on a glass of black label whisky. Her right leg was up in the air kicking to the tunes of "Valu Valu”. My future bride who was supposed to be a teetotaler was busy swallowing hot spirits like there was no real tomorrow! When I approached her, the macho looking guys stood up. They must have been 7ft tall! Things were becoming elephant for me. And that is why I had no choice but to tuck my tail between the legs. Indeed, I had met a real wolf dressed up in a sheep’s skin…