There is an old ‘The Who’ song called ‘Behind Blue Eyes’ that I absolutely love. It goes something like this ‘you don’t know what it’s like…blah, blah, and blah…behind blue eyes’.

Well, the gist of the song is that you don’t know what its like to live in someone else’s shoes. And you’d better not try to think they are not suffering quite as much as you are.

Well, I’ve often had a gripe that I thought was totally within my rights. My gripe? The fact that women have it easy as opposed to us poor men!

I mean, sure they have to undergo childbirth [something that I don’t EVER have to go through] but I still felt that they had it easy.

I remember way back in high school I, and the majority of the guys would have sleepless nights getting ready for the national exams and guess what? The ladies would be sleeping like sleeping was going to go out of fashion. Why?

Because, according to one girl, the boys were reading on their behalf’s. "Their husbands were reading in their stead”, one girl told me half-jokingly. Can you imagine that bullshi**t!

I’m losing weight, reading like a maniac while my future better half is just cruising through effortlessly. Shaaa!
There is a joke that says that ‘only the ugly girls pass their exams…because the pretty ones don’t have to stress….all they have to do is stay pretty and they’ll get a marriage proposal in a year or two. The ugly ones better go to school because unless they have ‘Value Added’ they won’t get hitched”!

Jokes aside, I thought the female race had it easy. That’s until one day I chose to see what it was like to be a lady. No, I didn’t start wearing pantyhose and mini-skirts. I chose to do something even more drastic, at least to me. I chose to ignore my natural impulse to eat everything that I could get my hands on. I chose to diet!

All the women I know have either dieted are dieting or about to start to diet. So, I thought, "here is something that every lady in the whole world has to go through not less than once a year; let me try it as well”.

Truthfully, I’m writing this piece in some weird sort of daze. I think my blood sugars are so low that I might faint anytime now.

And guess what I ate just a few hours ago…three meat pies and yogurt…but I feel like someone has given me a hit of opium.

I’m quickly re-establishing my respect for the ‘weaker’ sex. Women live on bread and black tea, smile and go through the day’s tasks. And women hoodwink us to call them the ‘weaker sex’, yeah right! They are as tough as buffaloes!

Contact: madogz2002@yahoo.ca