To the ones we lost

I was recently saddened by the death of my uncle. I hoped and prayed to God that it was a bad dream and that in the morning I was going to wake up and sigh in relief. Even though the coma he slipped into was our chance to say goodbye, I wasn’t there, so I quickly sent him a ‘mind text’ telling him dying wasn’t an option! But it was not be.

Thursday, April 05, 2012
Rachel Garuka

I was recently saddened by the death of my uncle. I hoped and prayed to God that it was a bad dream and that in the morning I was going to wake up and sigh in relief. Even though the coma he slipped into was our chance to say goodbye, I wasn’t there, so I quickly sent him a ‘mind text’ telling him dying wasn’t an option! But it was not be. He left us, way too soon if you asked me. And the next we meet, trust that I will hold it against him. However, his death got me thinking of all the beautiful innocent souls we lost in 1994. I remembered the horror and the pure evil of it all. I twitched as I guiltily realised I was grateful my uncle hadn’t met such a death. I thought of all the people walking the planet taking other people’s lives and getting away with it. I thought of what a wonderful father my uncle was and how the chance to raise his kids till they moved on to independence was snatched from him. I thought of all the irresponsible fathers out there who have kids and just abandon them.The people who died in 1994, what was their crime exactly? What did they do that was so bad they had to die that way? Why are we now scarred for life? Why do we sit here every April and mourn people who never died of natural causes? Why do bad things happen to good people? Death will come to us all, yes. But it shouldn’t be at the hands of another man. We live in a world where terrorists, murderers, rapists, pedophiles and the like walk scot free. We live in a world where just a few years ago, your neighbour beheaded your entire family right before your eyes. We live in a world where people buy guns and use them whichever way they please!Someone said to me, ‘Don’t cry. People die all the time.’ That’s true. But is that a reason not to mourn them? Don’t I have the right to feel sad? Don’t I have the right to miss the people I have lost? If crying is all I can do, then by all means I will weep till I can weep no more. That is my way of telling them I miss them. Then when the wounds heal, I will celebrate their life and all the beauty they brought to mine. I would like to reach out to all Rwandans as we remember our loved ones this April. Take heart and be strong. Remember the good times you had with them; cry, if it will make you feel better and smile because they are happy and exactly where every good person should be – Heaven!