Importance of real friendship

With the current economic crisis in Uganda, a friend and I have been taking walks to the market, trading center, restaurant, to campus, hang-out joint, salon...etc. These are places that previously we would jump on Motorcycles and go to but in a bid to save, certain things have to change.

Saturday, November 05, 2011

With the current economic crisis in Uganda, a friend and I have been taking walks to the market, trading center, restaurant, to campus, hang-out joint, salon...etc. These are places that previously we would jump on Motorcycles and go to but in a bid to save, certain things have to change.

The idea of a walking partner is enough as it saves both of us the boredom that can be annoying. So as we walk, we also talk. My friend was quite mischievous when she was still young so the stories are interesting. She and I are quite different in many ways; in fact, she is one of the most conservative but playful persons I know. Yet, we have become quick friends over the years.

I never will forget the time I aroused her from a sound sleep one night with a call from Jinja in eastern Uganda, during which I told her I had not only forgotten my wallet but also my room keys, so I was stuck.  Being the good friend that she is, she rose from her bed, went to my house and used the key I had given her, she found my wallet and room keys. She put them on a Nairobi-bound bus that dropped them in Jinja and I picked them.

She went beyond the call of dutiful friendship, and I will forever be grateful. Without her I would not have accessed my room. Since then, our friendly relationship has grown as the years go on. So, it’s only natural that as I stride through the dusty roads of Mukono with her at my side, my thoughts turn to the value, the significance, the firmness, the consolation, and the re-assurance of true friendship.

My walker-friend is among my "newer” friends, though I’ve known her for more than 3 years. There is my kindergarten friend who never forgets my birthday, even when I’m trying to let it slip by. My secondary school friend that I share with a number of expulsions from school because of mischief,. Over the years we have supported each other through many joys and challenges.

So many take friendship for granted, and I’ve probably made that mistake in years past. But any person, who has known heartbreak and disappointment, knows the value of true friendship, which often is the most sustaining and enduring relationship of one’s lifetime. Your best friend probably knows you better than your spouse. Yes, friendship is a love that outlasts many romantic relationships. In fact, many of us don’t know how we would survive breakups if we didn’t have a friend’s shoulder to lean on, to cry on.

A friend once woke me up at 3am crying because the girlfriend had ended their relationship. I just hugged him and my shirt got wet from his tears. Ooh please! Don’t sneer, there are emotional men and it’s only human to cry and this was a break-up. Friendships help you endure the hardships, get over the failed courtships. When other means of communication seem to hit a brick wall, you can talk and find understanding and light where there had been only darkness! When you want to cry, a friend will make you laugh out loud.

A friend who cares about you will also put you in check when the need arises. They will not tell you that you look good with all that awful make-up when in fact you look like a fool. They will not tell you that a lady is the right one when they know she’s a mess, though that is what you want to hear. They will tell you to "get over it” and come to your senses and keep your good-paying job rather than quit in a huff. A good friend will not sleep with your partner, or even your Ex; and she will not find fault with every person who takes an interest in you rather than them. They will not stab you in the back, but if the hormones are out of sync, a fight may ensue but apologies will come later

A good friend is honest and truthful. They give you encouragement and support. Not to cut you down with hurting comments at every opportunity they get. But be proud of your successes, not jealous and envious. And they in-turn will share your great fortune of having a very good friend.

jeav202@yahoo.com