Why is marital rape watered down?

What kind of man rapes a woman, whether stranger or so, his own wife?The perception some men have is that the second they marry a woman, she is his to do whatever he pleases.Maybe that’s what dowry means to them; treat a woman like an object he picked off the shelf in a supermarket.After all, he did pay for her.

Friday, October 14, 2011
Marriage is about mutual respect and understanding. Net photo

What kind of man rapes a woman, whether stranger or so, his own wife?The perception some men have is that the second they marry a woman, she is his to do whatever he pleases.Maybe that’s what dowry means to them; treat a woman like an object he picked off the shelf in a supermarket. After all, he did pay for her.

It is one thing to turn a woman into a personal punching bag but to forcefully have his way with her every time she isn’t in the mood is something else. And it really has nothing to do with his needs; it is just a barbaric and spiteful way of showing a woman who is boss!

Many women are faced with this problem and haven’t got the courage to speak up because the answer they get is ‘go home and give your husband what he wants and then he won’t have to rape you.’

Are you kidding me? Since when is a woman obliged to have sex with her man every time he wants to? I know some women take the ‘I am tired’ line to a whole other level but marriage is all about mutual respect and understanding; forcefully having sex with a wife doesn’t fit that bill.

Take legendary singing sensation Tina Turner for an example. Her marriage to Ike Turner was nothing short of a nightmare. Not only did his fists meet her face daily to the point of near un-recognition, but he also took it upon himself to rape her.

All he got was a divorce, which in my humble opinion was long overdue. He should have been jailed for the rest of his miserable life for the violence he inflicted on her and in that way, making sure no woman ever faced the likes of him again.

Women are not sex toys that are there to be used every time a man’s member gets excited. The perception that wives must comply, no matter what, just because their husbands feels like it, is terrible.

If he could just stop ‘feeling like it’ every other second then maybe that would help. No woman, married or not should be forced into having sex.

Has it ever occurred to these men that if the roles were reversed, they wouldn’t like it either?  She’s a wife; not the solution to any man’s over the top libido.

This is not what women sign up for when they get married because nowhere in their vows does it say that if the man wants to get ‘jiggy’ with his wife and she is not up for it then he can go ahead and rape her.

It is a crime even though some choose not to see it as one. Just because they are married doesn’t make it less important.

Some people think it’s only domestic violence when a woman is hit and that women claiming to be raped by their husbands should stop making such a fuss and do what they got married to do—service their husbands.

A tough world it is but it doesn’t have to be that way. Women can speak up and fight for their rights as women. Being physically weaker does not mean women have to be taken advantage of. Do not suffer in silence, speak up and don’t quit till justice is served!

rachelgaruka@yahoo.co.uk