There are a lot of situations that are embarrassing, but nothing I’ve encountered so far that beats the one we faced last week, even as I’m typing this, I still feel tingles of shame creeping and crawling all through me. It all started late evening after a day’s work, a friend who is a director General in finance institution, suggested we meet and crown the day with a bottle or two. We linked up at posh joint, and had great fun till late.
There are a lot of situations that are embarrassing, but nothing I’ve encountered so far that beats the one we faced last week, even as I’m typing this, I still feel tingles of shame creeping and crawling all through me.
It all started late evening after a day’s work, a friend who is a director General in finance institution, suggested we meet and crown the day with a bottle or two. We linked up at posh joint, and had great fun till late.
On our way home, we passed at a happening joint with cheap disco lights and loud music, my friend ordered the driver to turn back so that he can buy some cigarettes, we parked and he entered the pub, after minutes of waiting and no sign of him coming out, I decided to go and see what was happening.
This is how I ended up in a Mukubite bar! Mukubite is short for Mukubite umwice witch literally means, "beat him to death!” Why this label?
Well, it’s known fact that in these bars, if customers get into a fight, no one intervenes, or calls police, everyone minds their business, if you overpower your opponent, beat him like you own him till he surrenders.
Mukubites are small pubs that turn into mini night clubs at night; they play loud music, serve warm beers, have the lousiest services, are patronised mostly by low and no income earners, motor guys and some students who can’t afford to take their dates out in real-clubs, plus ladies of the night.
They dance, drink, and smoke till the break of dawn. But so many times people from other classes find themselves in these joints and mingle with their houseboys and office messengers!
When I stepped into this pub, I swore not to spend a minute inside. Entering through the door, I was hit by deafening music and folks were singing along! The place was packed to the brim! How do these people breathe? I asked myself, as I scanned the place for my friend.
I finally spotted him smoking with a huge bottle of beer laughing with a young man who was putting on a shinny t-shirt and checkered pair of shorts, they were shouting in each other’s ears like they were old buddies.
I managed to squeezed myself and got to him, "man, this is crazy, let’s go” I shouted. It was heard to hear what I was saying; I finally gave up and waited for him to finish his beer.
All the while, I cursed him for dragging me to this cheap pub. I bought a beer as I waited for him, but after emptying the first bottle, there was no stopping me! As the time matured, I relaxed and went with the flow.
After a couple of hours, like a responsible person, I cut the fun short, dragged my friend out still holding on to a giant amstel bottle, and we staggered out. This pub is situated on the main road, the moment we got out, we came straight onto the main road; the sun was already up.
The sneering look we were getting from folks who were going to work sobered us up a little! I tried to consult my watch for time, but it was gone! Stolen, my phone too. My friend though he had his watch, his black berry had vanished!
The attempt to get a cab failed! We were standing at the road side at 8am staggering with half empty beer bottles! Sober citizens going to work, were shaking their heads in disbelief and pity!
Jim my drunken buddy suggested we go back inside and get plan B. Only that plan B meant downing more beers till it gets dark again, and then find our way home.