Humour: Villager: Kicking the bucket with spirits in hand

Of recent, our country has been rocked by a series of tremors that have led to many people losing their lives.

Saturday, March 01, 2008

Of recent, our country has been rocked by a series of tremors that have led to many people losing their lives. 

In Kigali, people have been made to run away from the comfort of their houses for dear life.  I have realized how people fear "kicking the bucket”.  

I remember vividly, the year was nineteen sixty nine; why do I remember that year vividly?

Of course, this was when none other than His Holiness Pope Pawulo Uwagatandatu visited Uganda. Now, his visit was followed by a terrible earth quake that tore down many buildings in the Kabarole in western Uganda where I happened to be living. Many people were injured.

The Church or was it Virika Cathedral went tumbling down like a pack of cards.  Word has it that, the then Bishop McCauley vowed to rebuild the cathedral so strong that, no other earth quake will ever pull it down.

Talk of kicking the bucket, I could not easily get near anything that was called a bucket, leave alone the metallic "pail”.

We have since shortened the term to simply "kicking”, omitting the bucket and hence the bucket stopped causing any chill in our spines. Word has it that this popular term comes from a suicidal technique used years ago.

A man would tie a rope around his neck; secure the other end tightly to a tree branch while standing on a bucket. He would then proceed to kick the bucket out from under himself, thus killing himself.

So this guy was in the pub enjoying his daily dosage of the "hot stuff” when the earthquake struck all those years ago. As other people were busy scampering for cover or is it running away from the cover into the open, for him he was busy running back into the pub to save his small ka bottle of the Uganda Waragi.

A ka-quarter is that about half a glass in volume.  It is so convenient that people carry them in their jacket pockets lest they get "thirsty” and develop the urge to "quench” their thirst.

If he were to die it was to be with that bottle of Waragi in his pocket. Not a bad idea. After all, don’t soldiers get buried after a barrage of gun shots being fired into the air?

Can a good drinker not have ka-quarter safely stashed in his pocket? 

The truth is that when we eventually change from the physical world to the spirit world, we shall definitely require some "spirits” to keep spirits at bay; you get what I’m talking about? 

Contact: mfashumwana@fastmail.fm